Where Love is Found
by newcomer77
Summary: Jasper, recently released from the Army, doesn't plan to meet Alice at a dirty bar. She's a perfect, gorgeous singer, and steals Jasper's heart. She preforms with her pianist brother, Edward. Love is pure for all, but it isn't allowed, either. all human
1. Chapter 1

**_My first Human-Twilight Story. I hope you all like it! (Doesn't follow Twilight's story, only characters which Stephenie Meyer created)_**

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The room was thick with the smell of cigars, liquor, and sweat. Everything was painted deep chocolate, the only light from the dim entertainment stage. No one was playing right now. I saw familiar faces in the crowds of pink faced drunks, my friends. My fellow soldiers, still wrapped in their uniforms. Their hats were askew, their mouths already moist with beer. I heard the loud laughter, the buzzing of people's non sober minds. I myself didn't care much for liquor--it messed with your senses, and being soldiers, I though my fellow men knew that that was their most crucial tool.

I supposed now I shouldn't care much. I'd been released that evening, and hadn't yet told anyone, not even my army buddies. Not that I had many, but I didn't want to stir the pot on a night like this, with everyone together and ready to have a great time. How would they feel if I told them I wasn't going back to camp, that I could walk out of here a free man while they piled back in the truck?

I looked around for my brother--where could he possibly be? He was to be the first person I told. I had the admit sheet folded in my pocket now…I touched it just to make sure it existed. A few years back, I would have gone eagerly for the extra few years of service--fighting was in my blood, it felt. But now; homesickness had gotten me bad, and I just wanted to see my brother.

I had wrote him, telling him our automobile would be stopping at Crazy Anne's Bar tonight. I had wrote him, I had made it clear. I knew he lived in this little town that we were stopping in, and I wanted to see his familiar face. I didn't know how long the men would be staying (not that it mattered to me), but another half of our men were at the campsite by the river. It was at the edge of town, and they got permission to have a night out, one of very few, though I could do whatever the hell I wanted now.

I tilted my shiny black hat rim from my face, feeling my long hair spill around my face. It wasn't unreasonable length, but it had grown out and our general hadn't paid enough mind to have me clipped again. I wasn't one for the buzzed look, anyway, and I didn't mind if half the men teased me about it. I smirked to myself at the memories.

"Jazz!" I turned quickly at the source of the boisterous call, and found my brother entering the bar. Smoke broke around his smiling face, parted around his massive shoulders.

"Emmett!" I shouted in joy, shoving past the fat drunks that could hardly feel anything anymore. He squeezed me in his huge arms, and I had to push away slightly before he smothered me. We were the same height, but he always seemed three feet taller. I grinned at my brother.

"You're looking real good, Jazzy." He smiled, his dimples showing merrily. I chuckled and let him catch a waitress by the arm.

"Excuse me, miss, but is there a table we could possibly get?" he asked the cud chewing girl. Her half lit eyes actually sparked for a second at the sight of my brother. I knew that he had that effect on women, what with his neat jet black hair and huge body and boyish face. His bright green eyes pierced into her peanut butter-colored irises, blotted with plum-black eyeshade.

"Ummm…" Her painted red mouth fell as she assessed this. I rolled my eyes. No, she didn't have a chance. No, she shouldn't even try! "I think we are real full, sir."

Emmett laughed in that boyish, charming way. I smiled at the memories connected to it--now would be the time he--

"Will this make a table appear, miss?"

--would whip out the five spot. I watched as she stole a glance over her shoulder and snatched it from his white hand. Her own hand was the color of toffee and freckled mercilessly. She shoved the crumpled bill into her pocket and grinned. She had a gap in her teeth, I noted. I smiled again to myself.

"Right this way, gentlemen." I guessed she just now realized I was there, and she took her good sweet time with gawking at me, too. Emmett was always telling me what a heartbreaker I looked like, but I never really believed him. I was a little lanky, longish hair, plain green eyes. Sure, I wasn't ugly, but not dashing like my older brother.

We followed her through the maze of people. I saw my buds with women in their arms already. Their tawny hands were on women's faces, smearing the rogue and lipstick, kissing and embracing in the booths, empty glasses of beer on the table. I kept close to Emmett and the lustful waitress, dodging a man that was swinging his beer bottle about as he told a story with drunken flourish.

I nearly rammed into Emmett when he stopped, and we both watched as the waitress stalked up to a man that was passed out in his seat. Emmett and I exchanged a glance and smothered our laughter into our hands as the woman tapped the fat man's shoulder with her stiff fingers.

"Eh, Rudy! Time to go!" She called, trying to break his sound slumber, her cud snapping away in her jaws.

Emmett chuckled quietly, and the fat man stirred, his face ruddy and beet red. He lifted a limp hand and patted it against his forehead, and I realized that a dirty napkin was in it. He blotted away the sheen of sweat that glistened through his thinning hair. He tried to sit upright , snaking his rubbery arm across the back of his chair.

He groaned and began to head for the floor before the waitress caught him. He patted her shoulder and muttered something into her face, obviously reeking of the liquids he had downed that night by her grimace.

The waitress stood up with the fat man hitched on her hip like a child. He leaned against her, his shoes tangling together as she began to walk off.

Emmett laughed as the two disappeared into the crowd. He began to pool the many empty bottles together in the center of the table, stuffing the used cigars and napkins inside. I laughed along with him, wondering why we were even in this place. I look a seat as Emmett did.

"Is this the best restaurant in town, Emmett?" I jested. Emmet rolled his eyes.

"Now, don't you got dislikin' Crazy Anne's just for the loons that come her every Friday night." Emmett said sternly and jokingly at the same time, motioning at a faraway waitress for two drinks. I couldn't see her move in the crowd as Emmett turned back to me. "Y'know why it's so busy on Fridays, right? And Saturdays, too?"

I shrugged. "Off work?"

"Naw! No sirree. It's something way more important than not sittin' at home listening to the radio." I watched as his eyes widened, and he got that mischievous grin like he was hiding something. "I guess you'll find out pretty soon, though, Jazzy."

"Oh, come on, now! By the way you made that sound, it was like they hand out wads of cash every weeknight!" I protested. Emmett was in mid chortle when our drinks came.

"Thank you, little lady." Emmett nodded to her. I gazed up at her as well. She shyly smiled, her chestnut hair spilling over her face. I could see, even in the darkness, the way her cheeks bloomed of scarlet. I smiled softly when she met my eyes. Hers were chocolate brown and big, fringed with pleasant eyelashes. "Anything else whilst I'm over, gentlemen?" She spoke just loud enough to be heard over the hoots and catcalls of the bar.

I shook my head and reached for my drink, but Emmett was contemplating. "What's the special tonight?" The waitress smiled and looked up, brushing away her long hair.

"Turkey club. I heard it's real tasty. Olives, cheddar, Swiss--all the fixing's."

Emmet grinned. "Good, cuz I am one hungry fella!" The waitress blushed again.

"I'll have your order up as soon as possible."

"Gee thanks, uhh--" Emmett leaned in real close to look at her name tag, obviously making her uncomfortable. Her brown eyes shifted to the floor. "--Isabella!"

She smiled shyly. "I actually go by Bella. See you."

She turned on her heel and started into the crowd, just to be tripped by a large boot. She stumbled quite violently, her knees banging together. She froze, hoping no one had notice, before brushing away her hair and adjusting her skirt. I was disturbed to see that what had tripped her had been an army boot--shiny and black, laced to the top. The man wearing it was a guy I knew well enough--and he was in the arms of a powdery looking gal with a painted on mole on her cheek. It looked like a tick to me. I frowned and looked away.

"So, how's the life of a soldier treating you, Jazz?" Emmett asked, popping off the cap to his drink with the edge of the table. It clinked to the floor, and he didn't even bother to gaze down at it. He grinned even as he sipped it, his eyes glued to me, his brother. I supposed I hadn't been able to avert my eyes from him, either. Was he always so huge? I smiled, nearly forgetting his inquiry. I hadn't smiled so much in a good long time.

"Pretty fine. I miss home an awful lot, though." I hadn't lived here, I had a little cottage a few towns over, but Emmett was the closest company I came across, and we would exchange visits from town to town every weekend we could. I wasn't a stranger to Crazy Anne's, but it'd been years since I'd visited. I had seen Emmett a while back--we'd stopped a few hundred miles from here, and he was excited enough by my notification to drive all the way out. Bless him.

When I looked up, Emmett's face had sobered. It was stone like and serious. I bit my lip at the change in mood around us. I could feel something coming on…what he'd ask.

"You been keeping low, Jazz? Haven't got hurt much, right?"

I picked up my drink, set it down. Touching its coldness, letting my hands be numbed. I sighed.

"I've been trying--well…I did try."

"Jasper?" Emmett asked, his voice soft and concerned.

"Just a damned man that had a knife, that's all." I muttered, wondering if he caught it all. By the look of his face, he did. His stark green eyes were wide, his pink lips pressed together in silence. He waited.

I let my hand fall to the table with a thud. "It's nothing, Emmett. It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does, Jazz. Was it--serious? I mean, you're okay?"

I nodded, the rim of my cap shielding my eyes. "Yeah. I'm fine."

Emmett awkwardly sat in silence, and my ears were only filled with the buzzing around me. "An inch deep. Foot 'n' a half long down my back. Caught me after I tripped over a barbed wire like the dolt I am." I tugged at my hat more and brought the drink to my lips, cool and refreshing.

"I'm so sorry, Jasper. I wish I had been there for you." Emmett murmured.

I simply nodded and rested my lips on the glass mouth of the bottle. "Let's move on from all that junk."

Emmett shuffled in his seat, silently agreeing. I tipped up my hat to meet his muddied eyes.

"So what's up with you these days?" I brought my voice to a light tone. He smiled feebly.

"Nothing much, other than coming here every weekend. And working the mills the week. Nothing much has changed, my friend."

I chuckled darkly. "Wish I could agree to that." Emmett nodded solemnly. He became erect, stretching his huge arms, looking like they were about to tear his dark blue shirt to shreds. The lights behind me glowed; looked like a show as about to start.

Emmett's eyes glowed feverishly, and his palms hit the table, making the glasses shake. He broke into a smile, gazing at the stage, which I noticed was very near our table. We had a great view. I turned my body in the chair, and the lights began to grown brighter. I watched them burn bright yellow, casting streaks upon the red curtains. Emmett whistled and clapped his huge hands, stompin' his feet.

"God, Emmett. What gives?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow at my brother, who's eyes were trained on the stage like Jesus himself would step out of the curtains. He smiled idiotically wider as a man in a black tux sashayed onto the stage.

His pomaded hair was greasy and inky black, his face tanned perfectly, his teeth bright white. He smiled with his smoldering eyes, making me want to gag. I rolled my eyes as Emmett leaned forth in is chair.

"Ladies and gentlemen, you all know what tonight is, don't you?" the man asked with the smile plastered on his face.

I hadn't realized that practically everyone else in the restaurant had been watching just as intently as Emmett. I nearly clapped my hands over my ears as the place went into an uproar of hoots and shouts and spilling of beer. Tables were pounded, boots flopped around on the floor, fists were pumped. I watched, wide eyed. What was this all about, for God's sake?

"That's right, Friday night! We have the best entertainment on this side of town--hell, this side of the state!" The audience agreed heartily, and in the mix of the uproar, I heard several glasses smash with excitement. I imagined poor little Bella cleaning up after some drunken fool.

"You know them, you love them, and you want them--so here they are! The lovely ladies we call The Orchids!" The men shouted at this, practically on their feet now. Emmett was sitting up tall, pumping his hands together, making a sonic boom right into my ear. The velvet curtains fell away.

There stood a row of four ladies, as lovely as any. What was the fuss about? Each had a silver mic in front of them, all four sheathed in dark blood red. Each had a blooming white orchid in their hair, which would only make sense.

"Say hello to Annie!" The crowd hooted at the woman with medium length brown hair. She was pretty--dark eyes, fine freckles, defined legs. I clapped politely.

"And here we have Mona!" The crowd raised an octave to her--she had delightful red hair that spilled over her shoulder and bright red lips that looked like they were glowing. She twiddled her fingers at the crowd, and more glass shattered, more eardrum damage.

"And let's not forget the lovely Rosalie!"

"Yeah! Rose, you're a doll! Woo!" Emmett was out of his seat, and the empty bottles shook and fell, rolling every which way. I bit my lip at the craziness my brother was showing. I looked at Rosalie--she was a show stopper, making the others look boorish. It was cruel, really. She had long golden hair, catching the light in such a sultry way. Her eyes were masked in deep black, her lips large and luscious. Her fine brown eyebrow raised as she assessed Emmett, who she could clearly see right at the feet of the stage. She tucked her hands behind her and nodded privately to Emmett, who sighed like school girl and clasped his heart.

"And last, but not least, the wonderfully gorgeous…Alice!"

My eyes followed the black suited man's hand, to the one named Alice. I froze, my hand clasped around my bottle. I felt my face go numb, my jaw hang slack. Alice was the most stunning of them all.

She had short black hair, curled upwards and pinned with the lovely white orchid. Her eyes were a stunning sky blue, her eyelashes seen from my seat. Her lips were thin but beautiful, her cheeks dappled with a soft blush. She looked both modest and heartbreaking in that dress--it hugged her tiny frame. She was the shortest, but she looked ten feet tall and demanding attention to me. She smiled shyly as hats were tossed in the air, glasses clinked together in toasts, hands beating at each other, throats gloating.

I just stared at her. Alice. She was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen, and as each moment passed, I felt luckier and luckier to have ever seen her.

I didn't hear the man introduce the song, I didn't see him leave the stage. I didn't see Rosalie, Mona and Annie adjust their flowers and dresses and mics. I simply watched Alice as she smiled into the spotlight, her face radiant and dazzling. She was beaming, rare and delicate rays shooting from every inch of her.

She touched the steely rod the mic was on, swaying to the far off music. I heard faint trumpets…

The way she swayed her hips--was she trying to drive me insane? I swallowed, my throat feeling suddenly parched. I reached for my glass, not daring to let my eyes off of her. I accidentally tipped my bottle with a numbed hand, but I didn't care as I heard it trickle onto the floor. I couldn't care.

"'L' is for the way you look at me…" Annie began. I knew it was her, but I felt like I was wasting my time with her. I wanted to hear Alice, Alice who was driving me mad up there on stage. She was smiling at her co-singer and swaying her small, incredible hips.

"'O' is for the only one I see…" Mona continued, her voice a little gruffer than Annie's--though I knew both would be put to shame soon enough. Alice nodded at the music, her eyelids fluttering, her body swaying deliciously--

"'V' is very, very extraordinary…" That was Rosalie, and she already shamed the past girls with her powerful voice. I was impressed, and by the way Emmett exhaled sharply, he was, too. Alice licked her lips, her eyes widening as she opened her mouth for her part--

"'E' is even more than anyone that you adore." Her voice…I melted in my grimy chair, wooden and littered with chew underneath the seat. Her tiny pink tongue flicked inside her mouth, wide as the words spilled from her. She smiled into the light, her eyes glistening, before she unleashed their mighty power on the audience. More uproar, but none too loud to overshadow the song.  
"Love is all…that I can give to you…" Now they were all singing in unison, but I trained my ears on Alice and only Alice. Her voice was sweet, innocent, pure. I couldn't strain out Rosalie's voice completely, however--it was proud and shook the bar. Alice stroked the mic, her eyes closing as the music overtook her…overtook me.

"Love is more…than just a game for two…" Her lips parted and opened and closed, perfectly heart shaped and stained a beautiful red. Her wonderful eyes opened, piercing a man here and there. Oh, to be sought by that woman's eyes…I swallowed through my sandpapered throat again.

"Two in love can make it…take my heart and please don't break it…" Alice bopped her hips once to the beat, raising an arm as the men hollered her on. Her eyes opened, flashing in the spotlight, killing men dead in their seats. I watched, not realizing I was leaning forward, wishing for her eyes to just gaze my way--

"Love was made for me and you." The sound was so sweet, like clean silver water for a man near death of thirst--ravishing and necessary. How could I have gone on all these years without hearing such a glorious voice? Her final word spilled out in a smooth tone, unwavering and perfect. She clasped the mic, angling her hips, her feet following as her thin white neck swayed around the room.

I sat up, my eyes burning into her face, so angelic and heartbreakingly beaut--

Her shocking blue eyes met mine, and I froze up, my throat constricting, my hand clawing the smooth tabletop. I bit my lip, clenched my jaw. Her eyes lost that commercial flirtiness…there was something more, something she was thinking. Or realizing.

Her eyes were widening, her mouth pulling away from the mic. Her hands clutched the rod like her life depended on it, and I was shocked to hear the other women continue the song as she stared at me. I stared back, feeling electricity course through my veins as I held her eyes, wishing to never let go.

After what seemed years--but that wasn't near long enough…she tore her gaze from mine, and I think we shared the shock as the song ended without her joining the final note. My chest heaved as the song died, the music drawled off. I clutched my heart, which was beating feverishly. Never had it gone so loud--not even in battle. My breath caught, and I wished for her to spare me one more glance before she disappeared, eaten my the velvet curtains…

I watched her nod politely and brush away flyaway hairs as the crowd cheered, shattering my eardrums. She and her co-singers were beaming and curtseying to the audience, but her smile seemed thoughtful--not fully there. Rosalie grabbed Alice's hand and squeezed it, and the two girls smiled at each other as the spotlight beamed upon them.

I didn't catch it when the announcer closed the number, and the curtains began to glide down, to shut her from my sight. I was horrified--no! I had to see her--her beautiful face, piercing eyes, goddess body…

Just at the split second before the curtains slapped together, I caught Alice's gaze. Her mouth was parted, her blinding teeth showing with slight curiosity. She clasped her hands and watched me with doe eyed innocence, and I wanted nothing more than to hold those eyes, more perfect than anything else ever created.

The curtains shut her away, leaving me with the bombarding of applause. I winced, and was stunned to find myself out of my seat, my chair hitting the floor. I turned to it, watching it fall. I wanted to leap onstage, find her…

Emmett was up, too, so I wasn't making a scene any more that the others. Every man and woman was up, smiling and shrieking and bellowing. I turned to the dimmed lights, wishing somehow they were bright again, upon Alice.

"Woo! What a show, eh, Jazzy boy?" Emmett's voice thundered, far away and clouded. I stared at the curtains. He shook my shoulder, his hand huge, consuming the whole half of my body. The crowd quieted. We relocated our chairs.

"Hey, Jasper!" I snapped around at him, staring bluntly into his playful eyes. I felt the need to ask bubbling up inside of me like vomit.

"Will there be another performance?" I hissed. Emmett cocked an eyebrow at my urge. His face smoothed into jesting recognition.

"You fancy any of them Purdy ladies, Jazz?" I sneered at him, though it was true, but the way he was teasing about it made my skin crawl. "Hey, I don't blame ya!" He rose his palms in an act of surrender. "I, myself, have the eyes for the blonde beauty. The Goddess they call Rosalie." He drew out her name long and dreamlike, both a mockery of himself and half true to his previous behavior. I watched him closely--was this how I looked whenever Alice flashed into my mind?

"Is there another show or not?" I asked, twirling a used bottle by the neck. I stared into the non iced brown fluid in the bottom. Emmett chuckled.

"Aye, there is another show. Usually the girls have their own little spotlights shows with only one other or so accompanying them, and a few more like that one." Emmett explained, leaning back in his chair. "Oh, and there's this fella that plays the piano with the gals an awful lot, too. He's to the ladies of the bar what The Orchids are to us gentlemen, if you get me." He winked at me before bringing his lips to his drink, leaning back in his chair, nearly swaying it over.

He plunked the empty glass on the table and let out a refreshed sigh.

"Here you are, sir. Sorry it took a while." Bella the waitress came up to the table, a platter with a hearty looking sandwich balanced on it. It indeed, had all the fixing's. Stacks of cheese and lettuce and meat were kept from towering over by a rather long toothpick topped with several oriental green olives.

Emmett grinned as it was set in front of him with Bella's shaking pale arms. She straightened up and brushed her palms on her apron, smiling at us both. "You guys enjoy the show?" I guess she must've caught me eyeballing the stage. I turned from it and smiled shyly, tipping my cap.

"Yes, ma'am. Quite a show."

"It was, wasn't it?" she sighed. Emmett didn't touch his masterpiece of a meal just yet. "They are all awfully lovely ladies, it's a shame about the contract."

I straightened up so quickly that I nearly bowled over more glasses racked up by the previous drunk. "Contract?" Emmett and I said in unison, startling Bella.

She blushed feverishly and lowered her eyes. "Aw, I shouldn't have told you that." she said meekly. She wiped her hands on her apron over and over, obsessively. Her chocolate eyes met mine, then Emmett's. They were the eyes of a person about to tell a scary and cautionary story. "I--can't tell. Not now. Come see me near closin' if you really want to find out, 'kay?" She dropped her hands, her eyes hopeful. I nodded quickly, and I was sure Emmett was matching the gesture. Bella nodded to herself and scurried through the crowd.

I leaned in my chair, my eyes feeling heavy, but my anxiousness burned through my heart. Emmett peered at me under my askew cap. "So which one is it that you have an eye for, Jazz?" His crystallized green eyes danced.

"Alice." I blurted. Her name tasted so sweet on my tongue, yet so bitter that I had said it shamelessly and bluntly. Emmett smiled softly, looking into her drink. I clamped my jaw shut audibly and turned from him, my face burning. I was such a fool.

"The one with the short black hair and hips that could kill." Emmett commented; chuckled into his drink. He swished around the last swallow and set it aside. My mind thirsted for her vision now that Emmett dangled such a description over my head like that.

My eyes went back to the stage, waiting.


	2. Curiousity

**_Hello my readers! First of all, i just want to thank you for showing up to read my story. Please review, pleasepleaseplease. Reviews fuel the appearance of new chapters! Really--i take them to heart--i adore them. And a side note that you may realize more later--i was listening to the Moulin Rogue soundtrack when i thought of this story--i was listenign and suddenly saw Alice in a cute, saucy red dress, being as cute and quirky as eve, and saw Jasper watching her with his big stunned eyes. BAM! Story._**

**_Also, dear readers, if you woudl like to listen to the songs in this chapter (and the last) check out my link pn my profile. However, you may need to replace all voices with Alice's. check that out! And enjoy! and REVIEW!_**

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Rosalie nearly tripped over me as I turned to my left for the exit. I scurried as fast as I could--the slinky dress I was wearing practically tied my ankles together. I huffed with frustration as Rosalie's hand gripped my shoulder and jostled me from her path. Mona and Annie followed her, shoving past me while still maintaining some politeness.

Rosalie plopped down at her personal vanity, her hands going into her long locks, shaking at them, while she turned her head and studied her angles. Annie and Mona retreated to the opposite side of the room, which was more like a slender hallway divided by our mirrors. Annie and Mona were on the other side while I was the one paired with Rose as she would purse her lips and suck her cheeks at her reflection, the vanity light bulbs glistening in her brown eyes.

I took my seat next to her, my own vanity lacking all the extravagant jewelry she'd brought and the intricate perfume bottles. I fluffed at my spiky hair, touched my withering orchid. I looked into my own blue eyes, stroked with a line of light themselves. Rosalie showered herself with perfume, pumping the thing over and over until I coughed loud enough to be an irritant.

She rolled her eyes and capped the thing. "What's your problem?" she snapped.

"Your nasty skunk perfume, that's what." I hacked another round of coughs and crossed my arms. She scoffed.

We sat in silence for a while, and I knew I was always the one to apologize. She wasn't one for that, and if I didn't do it now, she'd be sour through the rest of the evening. Plus, I had to talk to her about something. "Rose? Sorry about that. It really isn't skunky." I smiled at her playful glare.

"Well, it has all the boys comin' for me, so…"

"Oh, don't be modest." I jeered, my smile radiant.

"Oh, don't think they aren't droolin' after you, Alice, You are the crowd favorite." I knew this was true, and I knew Rose didn't particularly like it. I bit my lip.

"Did you see those guys in the front table? On the right?" I asked quietly, staring into my own eyes.

"Oh, yeah. The big one with short black hair? What a hunk, huh?" She threw a playful elbow at me. I smiled. At least she had eyes for one guy and not the whole crowd.

"Yeah, yeah--but did you notice the guy that was sitting with him?" I asked feebly. Rosalie unscrewed her ruby red lipstick.

"Uh…naw, I didn't Alice. Why?" She didn't look away as she colored in her large lips. I sat and watched for a moment, my face burning, my hands trembling. What would she think?

"I think I had a dream about him once." I whispered. She didn't miss a stroke with her lip color.

"Huh." She put away the lipstick and fished out back eyeshade and went to work lining her upper lids. I bit my lip as to not completely lose it right there.

"Rosalie! Would you listen to me?" I exclaimed. She sneered at me, her white teeth prominent with the red lips.

"I am! It's hard not to when you are squawking like that."

"Well, don't you think it means something? I saw this guy in my dream and now--he's here! At Crazy Annie's with that muscle head of yours!"

"Hey! Don't call him a muscle head! Especially when the one you're after in a scrawny blonde in need of a hair trimming."

"So you did see him!" I was wondering if Annie and Mona were curious to what we were screeching about. I lowered my voice. "Well, what should I do?"

Rosalie sighed and plunked her eyeshade back on the counter. "How should I know? I mean, if he was in your dream, it had to be for a reason. You sure it was him?" Her brown eyes flickered to my reflection, which nodded desperately. "Then go talk to him. Maybe y'all are soul mates." She smiled and ran a brush through her envied golden-spun hair. I watched it billow and shimmer. I nibbled on my lip.

"…Maybe so am I and Mr. Muscle head." I laughed quietly, and as she beamed back at her one successful joke, the announcer man--Mr. Clark, was hollering in a very unpleasant voice--the one the audience never heard.

"C'mon girls! Hustle, hustle! You all look fabulous, now get your tookuses to the dressing station! Let's move!" He clapped his hands as we rose from our vanities and tried not to trip over our dresses.

I stole behind a stand-up shade illuminated with an oil lamp, just for this purpose. A dress swayed from a nearby hanger, and I ripped it off the wire and tugged at the one on me already. It fell to the ground in a heap of dark red, and I shimmied into the next number, which looked more appealing already. It covered more, which was a plus, and it was silver with tinkling sequins all over it. It was both simple and dazzling. I pulled it on, dashing out and asking to anyone that was near for a zip up.

It was actually a waitress that did it--I couldn't place her name. She had droopy eyes and browned skin, and chocolate freckles. I supposed she was only back here to see our other show--Edward. My brother.

He was the piano player of Crazy Anne's, and boy, was he great. He had a talent--he could make up his own original pieces in five minutes flat. Not only was he devastatingly great at his music, but wonderfully handsome. I especially loved his piano nights, when he got to wear a tuxedo. He pulled it off like no one ever could.

I didn't know where he was now, maybe getting prepped, himself. I was fairly sure that he was lined up to play with Rosalie's vocals tonight. I knew they would be wonderful together, in a performing sense…not the way Rose had started off to believe.

When Rosalie and Edward first met, when he and I were picked out for our looks and talent, she was determined to have him. I was infuriated with her right from the start--she believed she could just bat her eyes a bit and have Edward melt for her? I was certainly glad that Edward was one of those rare men--the ones that weren't fazed by lustful women. I knew how the drunken men would call out to Rose--she was so beautiful. And yet, Edward never responded to her letters asking for his company.

"Five minutes, ladies." Mr. Clark warned. Rosalie snatched my arm and jostled me to stand near the velvet curtains. I breathed in and out smoothly as the nameless freckled waitress helped us fuss over meaningless things.

"Oh, Mona, did you get your mascara reapplied?"

"Rosalie, don't you look stunning."

"Annie, is that something in your teeth?"

I scoffed quietly. As if she were to be the one to tell us how to present ourselves, when she was trotting around in a stained apron. I frowned to myself, letting my eyes catch the growing spotlight beyond the curtains.

I turned over my shoulder, making sure everyone was worried about how they looked before allowing myself a peek. I searched for him frantically, my face burning in excitement. I finally found him among the pink faced men, sweaty and lookin' to grab some poor woman's arse. I let my eyes wander upon him. He was so beautiful.

His skin was smooth, nearly poreless and the color of cream. His nose was angled put not pointed in that hawk way that always seemed to be on men these days, but subtle yet strong. His lips were the most interesting shape--both smooth lines of flushing pink, brought together softly. His jaw and chin were strong, yet it gave off an air of quiet confidence. His hair was peeking from under his cap…his army cap. Two tufts of wavy golden hair stuck out, looking soft as silk and interestingly unkept among the coifed and greased 'dos.

His cap obscured my vision of his eyes, rendering my heart to fall slightly. Just as I began to back away from the curtain, he looked up, cocking his cap to look at his brother. I greedily drank the beauty of his eyes…how they were cool green, soothing and chilling at once. How they sparkled in the dim light, lit with highlights of spidery webs of crystal.

"Alice!" Rosalie nearly slapped my arm, causing me to drop the curtains, but she couldn't punch the butterflies out of my gut. No, no, they stayed there, pleasantly fluttering as I realized I would now be in his line of perfect vision. I didn't know why I had dreamt of him, but I did remember my reaction to it.

I had nearly woken Edward in our beds in the private floor upstairs where we stayed together. I remember waking up, and whirling around, wishing…hoping…that he was still there, still in my arms as he's left my dream.

He'd kissed me, held me, brushed away my hair and muttered into my ear. He'd brushed his lips…those interesting pink lips, over my closed eyelids, sweetly telling me how it'd be alright, I didn't have to stay here anymore. Me and Edward were free now that he was there…and how he held me, and I'd buried my face into his collar, wishing this dream would live on forever…

I'd awoken, near tears as I realized I was alone in my cold sheets. I hadn't woken Edward as I got a glass of water and stared at my reflection in the overly bright bathroom.

"Go! Go, Alice!" Rosalie hissed, nearly spearing the back of my calf with her knife sharp stiletto. I bustled out, and as the warm heat of the spotlight bathed my face, I smiled that winning smile. Flashes, fragments of memories came to me…sitting up late at night, practicing my smile with Edward. Edward had told me how to cock my head and bare my pink gums to win full effect…for more pay. More success.

I didn't risk looking at the beautiful man yet…maybe not even until the song was through with. How I had butchered the last number! He rendered me speechless, and I had to resist the huge urge to turn to him and stare. How glorious he was…I knew this, but I could not think of that now….

The music began. I had already blanked through introductions! I blinked, hoping it was just us as a whole, not individuals, whereas I had been staring at the floor like a blithering fool.

I quickly snatched the steel rod for support, and tried to sway my hips to the music, but everything seemed jagged and wrong. I settled for snapping my fingers. It was a movement, and no one could hear…but I quickly tucked away my damned fingers when I realized it was slow number. I had to pull this together, and fast!

"You are my special angel, sent from up above…" Annie began as always. I gazed over at her, her chocolate hair glistening in the light, her white flower contrasting nicely. She closed her eyes, fluttered her lids, trying for one to pull heartstrings. I pressed my lips into a thin line.

"The Lord smiled down upon me, and sent an angel to love…" Mona crowed. She was perhaps the worst of us four, but maybe it was her uncommon gravelly voice. I listened to the lyrics about the Lord, remembering how Mona always would wear a rosary on her ankle…maybe she prayed she'd get out, too.

"You are my special angel, right from paradise…" Rosalie belted out, clasping the mic and letting her mouth open wide to reveal her beautiful white teeth. I watched her cat like brown eyes dart to the lower right, no doubt at Mr. Muscle head. She winked subtly and went on swaying perfectly to the slow tune. My part…get it right--

"I know you are an angel, heaven is in your eyes…" I was impressed that my voice held its honey effect, smooth and sweet, how it was intended. Did I dare risk it? No, not yet. Couldn't look at him just yet. I didn't want to distract myself with those lyrics matched with that face...so beautiful and uncommonly handsome at once.

All together now--

"The smile from your lips brings the summer sunshine…tears from your eyes bring the rain…" I never believed the lyrics I had sung so passionately before. I could feel my hips adapt to the slow music, my fingers grip the cold steel rod. My eyes fluttered closed, and I saw him, right there--oh I needed to see him, not from memory, but--

"I feel your touch, your warm embrace…and I'm in heaven again…"

How I wanted that touch…just his sight…my eyes pounded open, and I frantically looked for him. How everything blurred, colors of dull brown and maroon I'd so often seen, the shapes of the men, the white uniformed waitresses…

"You are my special angel, through eternity…" my voice became weaker as my eyes drew nearer to the table. I found his feet, in black army boots, spit shined and laced up tight, unlike his drunken, loose comrades. I willed my eyes upwards, and I wasn't too shocked to see he was watching me. My lips butted against the mic, my words softer and softer. His eyes were wide with awe, his perfect lips parted as his hands gripped the table like he was trying to hold himself down…maybe from jumping up and grabbing me and sweeping me off my feet…

"I have my special angel here to watch over me." I let the last note drag, and even as I stood mesmerized, I managed to sing with mellow sweetness. I shook my head softly, swayed my body in the waves of music, and let my eyes burn into his, which flickered with such interest and passion that I couldn't help but know that he felt similar to me, that he'd take a chance to peer through the curtains anytime like I had.

The crowd went wild, waves of clapping, stomping, whooping. I didn't know if I was smiling…Edward was probably out there wondering what was up. I bit my lip and didn't dare blink as I stared at that blonde-haired angelic soldier. I gripped the rod as to not fall over, or maybe I was more concerned with streaking off stage right at that second.

I hadn't heard the announcer dismiss us, but soon enough, Rosalie was once again bumping against my back and hissing that I get a move on. Could I?

My eyes were locked to his, and his back was straightening as I was being taken off stage in the flurry of my co-singers. I could see his shoulders go rigid, his knuckles turn white, his lips open as if to call out to me, then--

Only the curtain, the velvet whispered around my shoulders.


	3. Longing

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I sucked in a breath, feeling my heart squeeze already once she'd left my sight. I turned away from Emmett, hoping to mask my anxious face. Emmett was still clapping--Lord, he loved that Rosalie. I supposed I couldn't jest him much for it, in this position…

"Emmett?" I hissed to him. He let his merry chuckles taper off, his claps soften.

"Yeah?"

"Have you--have you ever met Rosalie?" I asked, feverishly. Emmett was quiet, and I turned to him, finally taking off my dirty army cap. I set it on the back of my chair, dangling. Emmett smiled a tad before admitting:

"Naw. I just think she'd beautiful." I was partially startled by his sincerity to a woman he'd never--God, what a hypocrite I was. I tugged at my hands.

"Don't you want to? Do you ever wish you could?" I asked carefully.

"Oh yeah. Every Friday and Saturday I wish that were true. Boy, she stills my heart." He smiled longingly at the closed curtains.

"What's stopping you?"

Emmett's eyes were wide, sparkling like emerald gems. "She's too good for me. Plus, I'm near sure they all dash off after the show. No autographs, no pictures, no nothing." Emmett's face sagged as he said this. I'm sure mine did, too.

"You're good enough." I muttered. He didn't answer. He looked around, seeing that some people were trickling out.

"I suppose that was the last show of the night, my friend. Men are headin' for the hills. Sorry about your heartbreak." He wasn't trying to be crude or mean--he truly was, for he felt the same.

"Closing time?" I watched as Emmett stood, and was shocked to see his sandwich had vanished already while I hadn't been looking. I tousled my hair and stretched my arms.

"I got the check, bud." Emmett fished out his wallet, then looked at me with sad eyes. "You gotta go now, huh? Back with your army pals?"

I gazed at my brother, feeling a smile betray me. I tugged out my admission slip and unfolded it, handing it to my dear big brother. He held his fat wallet in his flat palm whilst letting his huge green eyes drink up the information. I smiled as he blinked comically and peered at me over the sheet.

"You're home for good, Jazzy!" he bellowed, throwing his arms around me. I grunted but smiled at his huge hug, patting him weakly on the back. He drew away, his face burning with excitement. "Come home with me tonight, Jazz. I'll help you settle back in soon." I nodded to that.

Emmett turned to the exit, his face still aglow, when I barked out, "Wait!" He turned with a cocked eyebrow. "Umm…weren't we gonna talk to the Bella gal?" I asked nervously.

Emmett snapped his fingers. "Oh, yeah, yeah! About some…" he dropped his voice, looking around, "contract?" I nodded feverishly. "Let's go track her down!" he said enthusiastically, and he lumbered towards the thinning bar lined with toppled over stools.

Only a couple old geezers were left, asleep on their butts, glasses in their limp hands. I shook my head, and sadly imagined poor little Bella having to hail them a cab and clean up their booze.

"Psst!" Emmett hissed so loudly that it was hardly conspicuous at all. I rolled my eyes as he peered into the wreck of a bar, bottles and nozzles askew and broken. I heard the soft clicking of a woman's shoe, and shy little Bella came 'round the corner, a glass in her hand and a rag in the other. Her sleeves were rolled up, her eyes puffy and purple from the long night of butt grabs and cat calls. My heart went out to her. Poor thing.

"Hey, fellas." she said tiredly, pulling up a chair on the other side of the bar, her chalky elbows plunking to the surface as she continued with the cup. Emmett leaned in a little, his wise eyes flashing around for eavesdroppers.

"You got a story to tell us, about some contract, right Bells?" Emmett asked, very businesslike. Bella's lips twitched at the sound of her nickname within her nickname.

"Yeah, that's right. About the Orchids." She sighed and put away the cup. "Their lives aren't all the glamour you see up on stage, oh no. In a way, I have it better than them." Emmett and I exchanged a glance of disbelief. Bella chuckled darkly. "At least I can go home every night, but they all signed a contract without reading the small print. They are forced to live in this very building--to sleep here and eat here….must be awful.

"Joe, infamously called Fat Joe, is the husband of the deceased Crazy Anne, you see, but I know she didn't die from old age. He's about in his forties or so, and loves money. Maybe that's why he married Anne, I can't be sure. Anyways, he wants the best entertainment on this side of the state, and when he sees something he wants, he just won't let go. Nope, not a chance. Even if that means making the entertainers slaves, practically."

"What?" Emmett interrupted. I was too frozen with disbelieving horror to speak. Bella's doe eyes fell to the counter.

"All the singers live on the upper floor; they're treated well enough there, like any other hotel or something, they're just under real close watch. Joe can't risk catches like them." Bella ran a pale hand through her very long locks, which looked black in this light. "No cots and gruel and crusts of bread, no sir." Bella gave me a meaningful look, probably reading my worst case scenarios. Poor Alice…unallowed to live where she chose? I felt infuriated by that. She wasn't property--

"Say, what are your names, gentlemen? If you don't mind me asking, that is." She turned to the drinks, and began to check which ones should be thrown out.

"Emmett."

"Jasper Whitlock, ma'am."

"He's been in the army too long." Emmett joked. I scoffed playfully as Bella turned back and smiled politely.

"Nice to meet a hero fightin' for our country." Bella said. I nodded and smiled modestly whilst Emmett clapped my shoulder.

"Just got released, this one here." he said proudly. Bella's eyes brightened.

"Well, here's a toast." Bella brought out three drinks and swiftly uncapped them all in a flash. Emmett and I took a bubbling bottle and raised them as Bella did the same with a furious blush at her own idea. She giggled as our glasses clanged together, and Emmett went right to work downing his. I sipped my own politely, still getting over the slight buzz of the last.

Bella took one swallow and pursed her lips and scrunched her eyes. By now the place was deserted, and I was having a good enough time with only two other people. It seemed fine to me…except that lovely Alice was sleeping or getting ready to just upstairs, when she could be at a sophisticated cottage of her own, and Fat Joe didn't seem like the guy you wanted to cross. There was always tomorrow...but…

The thought made me set down my drink immediately.

**~*~**

I turned on the lights, letting the scent of cool washed sheets bathe me. The lights were off, the moonlight and soft illuminations pouring in. I let my eyes wander the familiar room. They went to the left twin bed, closest to the window. It was occupied.

I dropped my bag quietly and tiptoed to the bed. I sat on the side of it and pulled at the covers gently. "Edward?" He groaned and snatched back the sheets. "Edward, weren't you supposed to perform tonight?" I asked gently. I rubbed his shoulder.

"I'm sick." he groaned, his voice sounding gravelly enough to back that up. I frowned, shaking my head.

"How'd you swing that by Joe?"

Edward pulled the covers away a little bit so I could see him and moaned, "I showed him my face." He was sickly pale, verging on green, with a light sheen of sweat on his brow. His bronze hair was tousled on the white pillow. His green eyes were clouded over, purple halos bruising beneath them. I clicked my tongue in sympathy. "Well, we all missed you tonight. Rose especially." Okay, so that last part wasn't true…

"I told her I'm not interested!" He growled, tossing the blanket back over his head. I smiled.

"Do you want me to get you anything?"

"Orange juice sounds real good. Bring it by the gallon--I'm parched, Alice."

I nodded in the blue lit room. "I'll send for a waitress if there are any still here."

Edward startled me by throwing back the covers, his ill face framed by his matted shiny hair. His green eyes were now ablaze with fervent hope. "Could you…do you think that Bella waitress is still there?"

I gave him an arched eyebrow, my hand poised for the doorknob now. "Preference? You, Edward? Hmm." He scoffed and hid his face.

I left him then, with a smile on my lips. So, he had a little crush, it seemed. On a waitress? I was certainly not one to downgrade people based on jobs--I had this one by pure luck, and often times I wished I didn't even have that. I was lucky that my brother and I weren't picking pennies up off the streets.

I was glad I hadn't waited to change out of costume 'til I got to my room--now I could comfortably maneuver the elevator in my warm coat and nightie. The elevator clanked shut, the tiny box feeling like a cage. I felt my stomach leap up until it dinged to a stop.

I hurried out to the bar, and found the only light was coming from the streetlamps outside. Someone was leaving, and I thought it could be Bella. The door clanged shut, and I scurried after the person leaving. I burst through the door, only to be greeted by Bella, yes--but as she was revving off in a cab. I sighed and returned inside, not wanting to face Edward Bella-less.

I supposed there was a faint light from the glow against the bar mirror, where the lined up boozes were showcased. It was mostly tidy, but I could see that Bella had been left with the late clean up shift all by herself, and had gone home, leaving the tables for the morning. Poor girl--she was always run so rugged by her co-workers, like that unpleasant freckled, tawny girl that was always looking for Edward.

I found my way behind the bar and into the mini fridge that was hidden in the depths that the drunks never saw. It was tiny, white, cold and square, and stocked with unaloholic drinks, undoubtedly for mixing. I wrinkled my nose as I thought of all those disgusting men, drunk off their feet, smooching women they'd just met and passing out in their chairs while me 'n' the gals were putting on a show still.

I grabbed a nice chilled half-gallon of OJ (didn't want Edward up all night getting rid of it, after all) and began to head for the elevator, when my eye caught the table to the right of the stage.

Where that man had sat.

I hardly realized I was moving for the table, until my shin cracked against a chair that had been toppled over. I stifled a screech, gripping the juice feverishly. I shook it off and continued, my nightie grazing the dirty ground. Boy, I could tell why Bella wanted to wait until morning--cleaning this all alone would take hours! She needed rest.

I found the table and stared at it. It was cleaned off, sure, but crumbs and little ashes from cigarette butts (surely not from the green eyed man and his bulky buddy, I saw no smoke arise from here) more like.

That gorgeous being had sat right there, and saw me up on the stage. I was sliding into his seat, wishing he'd left a scent I could remember--

I gasped out loud when I found something hanging off the corner of the chair. Was that--? It was! I hissed in a sigh of delight as I gripped his army cap. His army cap!

My heart was beating so loudly--ringing in my ears. The orange juice sat lonely on the table top as I marveled over a simple hat.

I cradled it in my arms, looking at it intently. It was green with golden emblem on the front, and the seams were frayed and becoming white. The rim of it was sleek spit-shined black. I ran my trembling fingers over it, smiling gaily. It was so stiff--canvas, it felt like, and there were still little patches of dirt smeared on it--an oil stain here and there.

I closed my eyes and hesitantly held it to my face and breathed in his scent--oh how I had wished for something more from him than a faint dreamy memory. This proved he was real--I had seen him. The smell was wonderful.

It smelled a little musky, from the trees he'd ventured through and the dirt he must've rolled in--to get away from an enemy? He was a soldier, brave and true. The faint tang of sweat lingered, but it was in the depths of the stitching. I touched the fabric lovingly. It also smelled like cotton, though it wasn't made of it; a clean whole smell, and a faint shampoo. Edward was always telling me how keen my nose was, which sort of was a little joke between us. I inhaled deeper, trying to envelope every aspect, name every scent.

The shampoo smelled plain and clean, like the pillowcase you use for the first time. Refreshing.

I sighed and let my eyes open, to gaze at this hat I had seen him wear just that night. It had been so close to him, perched upon his blonde curls.

Edward had to be waiting, I had to remind myself. I looked around. Should I take the hat? Or what less, though--leave it for Bella to shyly put it in the lost and found? Wouldn't he be happier if I returned it myself?

The thought made me shiver with thrill--I hardly ever spoke to any of the audience members. Even Bella and I weren't terribly close, but I would get to her anytime I could. Rose was like a sister to me, a very vain and obnoxious one. Wouldn't it be nice to talk to a female that wasn't stopping at the sight of every mirror she passed? Bella was a sweet girl, and it seemed that my brother had the hots for her. I smiled in the dark bar and began to head for the elevator, hat and OJ in hand.

All the way upstairs, I was grinning.

In the dark room, I slipped in, hearing Edward's labored breathing beneath his covers. I quietly put his juice on the bed stand and hurried to my own mattress. It was cold under the covers, unused for a long while. The window was still wide open, and the night was rather chilly, but I was sure that Edward was burning a fever. Poor Edward.

I glanced over my shoulder as I laid on my pillow, and brought the hat up to my chin. I tucked it there and smiled as his scent lingered into my nose, and I knew what it would be like if he held me, somewhat. I'd rather have the real thing, but as I snuggled close to the fragment of the blonde man in the warming sheets, I was glad I had this, at least.


	4. Impatience

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"So what are today's plans, boss?" Emmett asked playfully. I smiled and rolled my eyes.

"As if I know, you're the one with the car and house and money, remember?" I held up some socks, wondering if they would fit me after being stretched over my brother's bulbous ones. I was already wearing his shirt, which I'd had to scrounge up some safety pins just to keep it on my body. I'd forgotten how dependent I was on my army clothes. I'd be glad to get back home finally and change, but Emmett's beat the army by far. Plus, I still had some things to do in this little town.

On the way home last night, I had noticed my head was bare--without my cap! I'd told Emmett, and he gave me a knowing smile and promised we'd pull in for a quick drink the next night. To be honest, I could hardly wait to see Alice up on stage again. The lights, the glittering dress on her thin frame, her hips wriggling beautifully underneath…

And as I had curled onto Emmett's stiff couch, pulling close a handmade blanket, I let my mind bring back her image, and I wondered what she was thinking about at that hour. Certainly not me, of course, but what?

"Then I say we stay in for now--you gotta be a little tired of trekking around with all those soldiers, huh?" Emmett had been watching me decipher which clothes I should wear--which would fit, I mean. Now he was leading me out to his living room--with the sunshine washing the chalk white walls.

I missed my brother so much. The smell of the mill had hit me in the closet--I had been traditionally appalled by the huge moose head on his living room wall, and the lack of food in the fridge from his never-ending hunger.

He sat in his big winged chair--me in his little loveseat. A cushion…how long had it been?

I looked around, cracking a smile. "How can it possibly be that my infamous brother is without a gal?" Emmett snickered, but I feared I struck a sore spot. How? He was the ideal boyfriend to many women--I'd seen a dozen lusty stares in last night alone!

"I'm pickier than you think." Emmett said.

"I've seen you date brain dead women, Em. C'mon." I insisted. He grimaced.

I fell silent. Could it be…was he waiting for the stunning Rosalie? The unattainable Rosalie? Well--maybe not to Emmett. He could get any girl, I could bet on that.

"Tell me some of your army adventures!" Emmet said brightly. I smiled at him. The minutes seemed so long until we could go off and visit The Orchids…

I told him about the life changing moments, the terrifying moments, the heartbreaking moments.

I told him how I had found a young boy from the enemy's side tangled in barbed wire--he'd only been maybe eleven. He'd cried out to me, tears flowing as he sobbed how he had been walking, minding his business when he'd tripped and was too scared to pull away from the horrible iron strings digging into him.

I'd been alone, and despite my oath to destroy the enemy, I had bent to my knees in the bloodied mud and untangled him. He had looked at me, expecting me to somehow whip out my handgun and kill him, but I did no such thing. I told him to run off-- I didn't want to get caught by my own men. He had nodded once and darted off, leaving me feeling better than I had in a year of killing men.

Then, of course, he asked more about my scar.

I couldn't help that my face burned with shame--I had been so foolish. I'd been running after a couple of men, my own guys at my heels. I'd told them to keep running, I would sneak up if they failed. I'd waited for any gun shots, watched for any other men, but suddenly, out of the blue, I supposed the enemies on the run had circled around and found me again.

Some barely registered me, those who were unarmed. I'd shot one man down dead, but the one lagging behind their little pack had seen me and leap for me. He had pried away my weapon, throwing it in the brush. I had no chance unless I ran--I could see the evil glint of moonlit silver in his hand.

That was when I tripped over the barbed wire that had been everywhere--webs of it. The night actually left me with two scars--for the wire slashed me with bright red brutality. I'd fallen face first into the mud, the soaked leaves choking me, and the man had sailed through the air, his knife pointed downwards--and…

The medic told me I was lucky he hadn't gotten my spinal cord. I'd be paralyzed, which would have been even harder, of course. I had to consider myself lucky, but I didn't feel like it when I saw my bare back in the mirror, the line jagged and purple-maroon.

Then the heartbreak was staining…seeing my friends die on the field. I didn't even let my mind wander there--let alone speak to Emmett about it.

I hadn't noticed how time consuming talking about the past--of all things--was until I gazed at the clock, finding that the ladies would begin singing in only two hours. I must've looked rather silly as I jumped up from the couch, frantic. Emmett had grabbed my loose shirttail and sat me back down, telling me to calm myself and tidy myself up a little. It didn't take long to get to the bar, but we wanted a good seat again.

I watched the city whisk by in Emmett's clunker, the wind whipping my hair, which wasn't tucked away by my hat. I'd still had the habit of tipping my rim, looking foolish as I gripped air. The sun was just setting, the air sweet with smoke from barbeques and such roasts like that.

In only hours, I would be seeing Alice once again.

~*~

"What's that ratty old thing?"

My skin crawled, burning, my mind racing for an answer to Rosalie's snooty question. I twirled to see her lifting the beloved cap from my bag, not holding it like I did--carefully and with love. She was used to sparkle, glam and glitz--so she held it like a dead vermin.

Fire shot up inside of me, and I slapped away her snow white hand, reddening it and catching the cap as it fell. As she stared at me, wide eyed, I simply hissed, "Keep out of my stuff! God, you've been so terrible lately." I shook my head and gingerly laid it back in my bag.

I heard Rosalie sputter, then the stomp of her heels and she was gone. Good riddance.

I fanned myself a little, but I couldn't brush off the fire feeling dancing on my arms, twitching behind my eyes. I paced around, shaking my head, lifting my hair. It was nearly show time, and I was burning from the feverish encounter with my co-singer.

I pattered by the curtain, curiosity seizing me in a steely grip. I whipped around to see everyone was fussing over themselves, and hope sparked through me like a blue firecracker.

My white fingers ripped at the curtain's velvety edge, my nose brushing the fabric.

All the antsy, sweating sensations blew off of me in a cool refreshing breeze as my eyes found him, in the exact spot as last time. It was like seeing him calmed me; and why wouldn't it?

He didn't look calm himself, in fact, he was twiddling his thumbs furiously as his brother watched him with unsure eyes. The wonderful blonde haired man's iced eyes kept switching around, too fast to keep up with.

Suddenly, he was staring at the tiniest crack in the curtain, leading to the busy world of post-shows. I whispered a gasp, leaning back a tiny bit, but holding his eyes whether he was seeing me or not. Could he be? No, the crack was only the width of my pupil--

He straightened up, his clasped hands unfurling as he gripped his chair and stared at me. I could hardly move under his glorious stare…he could see me, couldn't he?

"Alice!" I whisked away my head, everything feeling slow. The lights were flashing...brighter than before, the girls lining up, their smiles strained at each other. Their hair was bouncing…the glittering…I blinked my eyes. I only wanted to turn back to the curtain and look into those icy green eyes for...for…

"Get in line!"

--ever.

"…The Orchids!"

Ear pounding applause, pushes on my back. Tripping over my tall silver heels, feeling hotter than ever under the lights…was my skin melting? I looked to check, but Rose only pushed me harder.

The crowd was screeching…must be show time.

I was sure there was a faint sheen of sweat on my forehead, but I had to smile. Smile that dazzling smile; Edward would root me on. I knew tonight was my solo night, and I couldn't make a fool of myself. At least it wasn't a fast paced song where I would have to groove around like I was having fun melting away on stage. I cleared my throat and seized the rod, gently caressing it. The music began. I didn't risk a look just yet.

"I follow the night, can't stand the light, when will I begin to live again?" I let my eyes close, the heat was so terrible--the light!

"One day I'll flay away…leave this all to yesterday." My voice sounded normal--was it? I couldn't feel anything but the heat…

"What more could your love do for me? When will love be through with me?" I continued to croon, swallowing probably loud enough for them to hear.

"Why live life from dream to dream…" I sucked in air. My smile was erasing.

"And dread the day…when dreaming ends?" My heart was pounding in my ears--so loud, the blood rushing…burning…the bright lights…

My feet were shuffling, dragging along the mic like always...I was fine. Fine.

"One day I'll fly away…" Was that a voice warble? I was shaking--oh no. The lights were burning me! I held up a hand to shield myself for just a moment-- "A-and live life from dream to dre-aamm?" Oh lord, Joe was gonna kill me…

"An drad da daee when dreemin endds…" A thick coat of saliva was in my throat, choking me, and the lights were so damn bright! Finish the song, finish the song:

"Won daee, I'll flyee--"

_"Oh, God, catch her!"_

The mic, silver and spit-shined, flew from my hand, and I watched it as I fell. I was falling off the stage, my feet kicked out from under me. One silver heel broke off and flew--looking like a knife, glinting in the heated light.

My body turned slowly--it seemed to me, as I fell, gracefully, and I wondered if it would hurt. My world felt heavy. Swollen lids pried themselves open, sweat trickling down my back. I saw him, the closest I had ever been.

His eyes were wide, bright with concern. My face felt like rubber--I couldn't flash him a thankful smile for what he was about to do. His arms were outstretched, and let myself become limp as I fell closer to the ground.

I saw red and that bright white, my face sweating, and then--

_Fly, Fly Away…_

* * *


	5. Comfort

**_I know i've been a little lazy lately with updates. please stick with me! Review, please oh please!_**

Things happened so quickly. One moment, I was watching Alice approach the mic, smiling, and I could hardly see anything else. Her voice was smooth and wonderful, and I let my eyes dance upon her as my ears were blessed. Then, she began to look worried, her blue eyes widening, her hands visibly shaking.

I had become erect, as Emmett tried to calm me, but I heard his own worried gasps. Alice had dragged the mic around like a drunkard, her feet unevenly clunking around, her eyes half lit, her forehead shining. Her lips were chalky, her face suddenly sallow and sweating.

I was out of my seat when she began to mispronounce words, warbling and blinking for long spells. Emmett barked at me to sit down when I darted up--but I could see what was to come.

Alice's eyes closed, her mic releasing from her hand. Her dress, red with thousands of bead strands dangling from it, fluttered through the air. With a pounding pulse, I lunged with outstretched arms.

I barely grunted as her whole weight fell on me--she didn't weigh much. I held her tight, and her skin felt so moist and cold. The audience erupted in chaos, but I simply lowered her and gazed at her face.

Even unconscious, she was beautiful. I brushed away her bangs, which stuck to her forehead. Her eye sockets were a deathly purple-green, her lips as white as her face. I had no coat, so I let my lap be her pillow, my hands still touching her face. I was touching Alice's face…it was so smooth and soft.

"Someone get help!"

"What happened?"

"Did she break anything?"

"Let me see!"

I felt a couple bumps into my back, but that was followed with Emmett bellowing, "Hey! Back off!" Of course they did. The chaos even lowered a level.

I didn't look at anything but her…she was so ill that it made my heart break. I stroked her face, brushing away the dampened hair. Her lips were slightly parted, she looked so peaceful that one would think she was dead.

"Alice? Alice!" a male's voice cried, making my heart squeeze tight in regret. I turned now, my eyes breaking from her, to see a handsome man in a black tuxedo squeezing past Emmett. My brother scowled for a moment, until the man fell to his knees beside me, his green eyes panicked.

His face was tight with worry, his eyebrows raised over glittering irises. His bronze hair seemed windblown from obviously running to this spot, and as I stared at his attractiveness, I felt my heart hang heavier and heavier.

The man looked from Alice to me with grateful eyes. They yet burned with worry, but he breathed, "Thank you so much for catching my sister."

I hissed out a sigh of relief. They were not married or sweethearts. I managed a half smile to reply. "She--she could have broken her neck--! Oh, Alice." he fretted, touching a cool cheek. "She must've gotten it from me." he said nearly to himself as he bit his fist. He looked back at me, looking like he just realized I was there. "I was ill last night--vomiting, fainting spells…she must've caught it from me." I silently nodded, looking upon her again. She remained still…but as gloriously beautiful as ever.

"What's all this fuss? Edward! Get off your knees, you'll scuff up that suit, boy!" a large booming voice pushed through. This bronze haired man named Edward turned to the direction it was blaring from. I followed his gaze, my hands gripping on Alice.

A very fat man with ginger red hair seemed to roll forth. He wore a top hat and shiny black suit himself, with a rich red rose in the button hole. Had I seen him in the bar? It seemed impossible that he'd be here and I hadn't spotted him. His face was ruddy, his blue eyes bloodshot and bulging, his moustache unfurling. Edward had sprung to his feet, his nervous eyes on Alice still.

His beady eyes laid upon her, and I sensed no worry in him. That made me want to punch him--how could he not care that a beauty like her was lying on the dirty bar ground? His swine eyes shifted to me. "And who are you? Why you touchin' my starlet?" I clenched my jaw and was slightly relieved that Emmett was brushing up against the fat man's elbow, letting himself be known.

"That's my brother, Jasper. I'm Emmett. She passed out, and we were just trying to help. He y'know, caught her 'fore she cracked her skull." he spat the words, but the man didn't flinch.

"Nice to meet you, I s'pose. I'm known around here as Joe, but call me Sir, if you please."

I bit my lip nearly hard enough to make it squirt blood.

The tiniest gasp came from beneath me, and I whirled towards it. Alice was moving her head, shaking it from side to side--rolling it, rather. She hitched a breath and tried to lift an arm.

"Alice!" Edward called out softly. I watched her with wide eyes as she began to try and open her eyes. Her lips were relaxed, her face undoubtedly numb from her faint. Her heavy sallow eyelids opened, and I watched her pupils dilate for a moment at the lighting still on stage. Her bright blue eyes flickered all around her, catching her brother first off. "Edward." she sighed, and her face relaxed more. I gently stroked her hair, and her eyes shot into such awareness that it startled me.

Her bright blue eyes studied me, and I realized that her chest was raising and falling rapidly. Her jaw hung slack, and her fingers began to knead at each other, trying to make sense of this. I saw her upside down as she laid in my lap, gazing up at me with huge moon eyes.

"Who--who are you?" she asked ever so softly. It was such a tinkling sound, like the sound of a baby river over pebbles or a wind chime greeting the sunrise. I tried to speak, but couldn't.

"This man saved you, Alice. Do you remember anything?" Edward bent down a bit. She seemed a little more focused upon seeing her brother.

"I remember falling off the stage because I felt so--" Alice tried to sit up quickly , leaving my grasp, but touched her head and moaned sharply. I scooted up close behind her, which proved useful when she fell backwards.

Her neck was inches from my mouth; I could smell her airy, sweet perfume and strawberry scented hair. I could feel her breathing, rapid and jagged, and her warmth through my shirt. I could hardly stop myself as I touched her forearms and whispered into her ear, "Easy."

She let out a sharp breath, her hand going to her head, her body stiffening. I didn't want to let go, but was she uncomfortable…?

"Can you get up, Alice?" Joe asked. She was still for a moment, then softly said, "Edward, can you help me?"

He crouched a bit and took her shoulder and elbow, coaxing her upwards. She slowly went up, grasping him for dear life. I straightened up too, taking a place by Emmett, but not too far from Alice.

"You got it?" Edward asked, his green eyes flickering. Alice nodded meekly, but before I could say anything, Edward let go before assessing her broken two inch heel.

She wobbled from no balance and dizziness, and I managed to scoop her up from behind as she fell once more. I steadied her on her feet, but she didn't look at me. She felt so wonderful in my arms…

"Alice!" Edward's face was frantic, and that added to his late illness made for a very sickly gentleman. Joe turned to him.

"Edward, aren't you on in a couple minutes?" He whipped out a golden pocket watch and nodded to himself. Edward looked at the man like he'd grown lobsters from his ears.

"Are you insane? My sister just passed out! I can't perform--I need to take care of her! She needs to lie down!" Joe cast him a dark look.

"Any other time I would make an exception, but you need to be up there now more than ever. You missed last night, and The Orchids are still recovering over this mishap." Joe turned to me as I held onto Alice, who was kneading her temples. "Have this fella escort her to her bedroom and everything will be fine. She'll nap 'til you are done."

My heart fluttered at that suggestion, then compressed painfully when Edward shot me a worried gaze. He wanted to take care of her--not some stranger from a bar. He didn't know me--I could be any drunk looking for a pretty lady.

"Meet you behind the curtains in five minutes, chum." Joe grumbled and wobbled off. Edward grew a deep worry line between his bright green eyes, his shoulders slumped, his hair disheveled.

"Em, take her." I said quietly near her tiny porcelain ear, and soon she was out of my grasp. My arms felt cold and naked as I walked up to Edward.

"Edward, right?" He nodded meekly. "I'm Jasper, as you heard, Jasper Whitlock. Listen, you can trust me. I am not one of those drunken idiots that come in and take advantage of every woman he can find. I'll be sure that your sister makes it to her room safe and sound, and she'll be comfortably sleeping when you find her. I promise you."

He sighed, his eyes glazing over. "Alright, I trust--"

"Does she need anything? I could get her some water." I turned to see Bella, her shining ringlets catching the lights. Her brown eyes glittered, then widened in shock when she spun to see Edward standing there. Her tiny pink lips dropped apart, and her face washed with maddening scarlet. She touched her hair, tugging it over her shoulder to hide her face a little.

I noticed that Edward's eyes were slightly brighter, more aware. He looked at Bella with fascinated eyes, and said levelly, "That is very thoughtful, Bella, but she's leaving now. Thank you." Her chocolate eyes illuminated at this, and she stumbled off with a pink face. Edward cleared his throat.

"I should go now. Please get her there safe; like I said, I trust you gentlemen."

I nodded, then turned when I heard Emmett coaxing Alice to walk. I hurried to her other arm and steadied her. I tried not to stare, but she once caught me with drowsy eyes and held mine for a moment before she let her lids clamp shut.

I felt her cool skin, her moist palm gripping on my forearm. Emmett pushed through the crowds and snapped at nosy drunks until we stumbled to the elevator.

We carefully brought in Alice, who was looking a little bit more aware. She awkwardly let go of us and slipped off her shoes, not wanting a broken heel to be the reason she'd fall. She swallowed and sighed, brushing a hand across her face. "Thank you for helping me." she said simply, staring in front of her, not meeting our eyes. Emmett gave me a confused glance over her tiny head.

"No problem at all." I murmured, and leaned against the caged room. We stood in silence.

The doors whisked open, and I moved to grab her elbow and steady her. She politely shook away and met my eyes. "I'm okay, really."

"You're sure?" I held her sparkling blue eyes, wonder probably plain on my face. A worry line erupted in her brow and she turned away, stiffly holding her tummy.

Emmett jolted backwards before she could vomit on him. She heaved, her tiny body trembling. My heart screamed. "Lordy Lord!" Emmett cried as Alice stood curled over herself, her back shaking.

"Let's get you in bed quick. I'll get you a bucket there." I gripped her bare shoulders and led her down the hallway 'til she halted at her door. It wasn't locked.

"Hey, guys? I'm gonna go get someone to clean this up." Emmett called, and I actually relished his clomping footsteps. I was sickening.

Alice didn't bother with the lights; I didn't think she much wanted them at the moment. She clomped towards a made bed, and to my shocking embarrassment, she unzipped her dress and let it fall, revealing her undergarments. I felt blood rush to my face, and I immediately swerved from seeing her.

Yet, I could not banish the image of her thin figure in the dim light, her thin white lace bra and panties bright against her powder skin. I didn't look back until she was safely under the covers.

I went off into a kitchen area in the apartment and retrieved a sturdy bucket, bringing it near as I pulled up a chair beside her. I looked upon Alice, how her face was chalky and sweat traced along her upper lip. Her lips were quivering, wet from being licked after she had let go of her stomach. Her eyelids were purple and swollen, her hair in tangles--yet she was still the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

"Would you like anything? A drink, perhaps?" She closed her eyes and smiled ruefully.

"There…should be some OJ in the fridge. I got it for Edward last night." she whispered shakily. I ventured off for it, returning to her weak form with the half-gallon and a glass. I poured it for her and wondered if she could handle it herself. She must have seen my thought process and smiled weakly. "You don't mind, do you?"

"No, not at all." I replied, maybe quicker than intended. I blushed again and cradled her face politely and brought the glass to her full lips. I was probably staring as she gulped it down politely, her tiny white throat bulging as she swallowed, her eyes closing from the chilled liquid. She drank the whole glass.

She fell back on her pillows, her eyes shading close. I began to stand, but as soon as I did, her brow crinkled, and she shook her head weakly. "Don't…go."

Startled but unwilling to object, I sat back down. She sighed and pried her eyes open an inch, looking at me. Never in a million years would I have imagined this would happen.

"Thank you...really, for saving me. I could have died, you I...landed funny."

"I know." I replied. Silence.

"Um, I have something of yours…" she drawled, licking her lips again.

I waited, and she finally rasped, "It's in the dressing room in my bag. It's your cap--I saw you last night with it on." She melted on the pillow.

I smiled a little. "Thank you. I'll get it back sometime from you so someone doesn't accuse me of stealing from a woman's purse." She chuckled a little, making me feel a bit better. More silence. "You were really spectacular last night." I wondered if she thought I was inferring to our long stare.

She laughed dryly. "Not too hot tonight, huh?" I laughed along politely, but I didn't find anything humorous in the way she laid thinly beneath the sheets.

"I should let you rest." I told her gently, but her brow crinkled again.

"Stay 'til I fall asleep?" she asked, barely audible, looking away. I nodded, and she let her eyelids fall hard.

I sat for forty five minutes, though she must've conked out in the first five. I watched her breathe, causing the quilt to rise up and down. I watched her mouth part, her white teeth showing in her peace. I spotted her hand had fallen from the bed, hanging over limply.

I took it in my own hand ever so carefully. It was cool and moist--sickly but wonderful to hold. I brought it slowly to my lips, and kissed it as if it would break from hard pressure. She smelled so sweet and she was so smooth. I held it for perhaps ten more minutes, and struggled within myself to finally leave. I knew our next meeting wasn't far…

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	6. Desire

**_here is the next chapter--and i must be honest--please comment, because that is whta makes writing this worth it! without it..what's the point, y'know?_**

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I woke up from the sunlight burning my face. I cracked open an eye practically glued together by sap. My throat was so dry and scratchy, my stomach withered and roaring. My pillow felt hot and greasy. I moaned as I clicked my tongue with the nasty aftertaste of last night--

Last night! What had been a dream and what hadn't been? I was practically dead on my feet, I remembered that…and I remembered that that man had come into my room. The man…named Jasper. And his brother was Emmett--that was right. I trained my eyes on the white sun 'til I winced away.

I had nearly puked on Emmett…and he had gone for a mop or something, and Jasper had helped me to bed. Had I undressed in my dream or reality? I felt burning embarrassment as I realized that I was in my undies…how mortified he must have been! I blushed a delayed blush.

But he had stayed...after I had asked him, he had done so for me. I managed half a smile at the memory…how his face was the last thing I saw before the darkness consumed me comfortably.

I sat up a little, and spotted Edward crouched over his typewriter, clanking away. Many nights I had fallen asleep to Edward clanking away on that thing--I think he had a bit of insomnia sometimes. I always wondered what he was writing about, but he always told me that it was a personal journal of things.

He looked up and smiled with relief. "Thank goodness you are alright." He stood up and began to bustle around me. He fluffed at my pillow and straightened my quilt and poured me more orange juice. He sat…exactly where Jasper had the night before. He had bruises under his eyes, as if he'd been pacing around all night.

"You can dedicate this day to rest, Alice. Sunday means no performances for a long while." He handed me the glass, and I stared into its tangerine colored milkiness. To be truthful, I wished it wasn't Sunday…I wanted to see Jasper again, and we were never on the stage Sunday through Thursday. I sighed into the cup.

"I'm so glad that you didn't fall head first from that stage." Edward added, watching me meekly drink. I swallowed and stared at him. "I think we should invite those two fellows for a dinner treat as a thank you."

My heart leapt, and I couldn't wipe off the huge sunny grin I obtained. Edward raised an eyebrow at me.

"What?"

I sheepishly pushed my face back into the glass and shrugged. Edward smiled coyly. "You like him, don't you? Jasper, right? The tall, lanky blonde?"

I shrugged again, but Edward was grinning. "That's great Alice! You can hook any fish in the sea."

"I have a feeling that he's more than just any fish." Edward cocked his head. "I had a dream about him before I even met him!" I blurted, but it felt good to tell someone that cared.

His eyes popped open. "Really? Wow. Then it must be fate."

I rolled my eyes, quaking a little. "Don't jump to conclusions."

"Well, we'll see how fast you get better. You'll probably be just fine by the end of the day, but maybe we should stall the date until it's set in stone." I nodded reluctantly to that.

He patted my arm and rose back up and sat down at his typewriter. I cupped the glass in my hands and stared at it for a long time, not thinking about my thirst at all.

~*~

I was pacing in Emmett's living room furiously, at wit's end on what I should do. How could I wait until Friday? It was totally out of the question--insane! I would never make it. Emmett watched me with wide, concerned eyes. "Man, just go back and talk to her!"

"I can't! She's ill, and I don't want to show up while she is still in bed, looking like a jerk trying to take advantage of her." I snapped, and began to pace again. Emmett sighed sharply.

"Well do something besides wear out the carpet, huh?" He lumbered to the fridge and pulled something out--orange juice?! Everywhere I went, I saw something in connection to her. I growled and began to walk, but the walls seemed to be closing in. I darted outside, leaving Emmett surprised and with citrus dribble on his chin.

I nearly tripped on my way out--and it was only to stand in the sunshine amongst Emmett's unweeded grass. I spread out my hands and let the wind blow across me, trying to let the waves of coolness calm me.

…Had I stood that way for two whole days?

I could hardly remember doing anything until that one evening. I must have moped around, unasked by Emmett. He was probably thinking I was such a loon.

But it was one afternoon when I was practically passed out asleep on the loveseat when the phone shrilled. Emmett bounded for it while I fell to the floor is fright, watching him upside down with my odd view. The carpet was hard.

"Hello?" Emmett's eyes flickered to me for a moment, happily teasing. "Oh yeah, I'm real proud of him."

What? What did I do? Take out his garbage? I jumped to my feet.

"Oh, wow! That is really thoughtful, man."

Man? Was this a buddy of his? Hadn't he called a waiter at the bar 'man' once, though?

"Tonight? Oh sure. Dying to get out of the house, you know."

I tapped Emmett's shoulder, but he shrugged away and twirled the cord in his meaty white fingers.

"Uh huh. Yep. Oh, sure. 'Course!"

I growled and punched Emmett's arm. He chuckled and said, "Seven, then? Sounds swell. Hey, thanks. Yes. I'll tell him right now. Bye."

"Who the hell was that?" I demanded, gripping Emmett's huge arm. He pulled away easily and rolled his eyes at the intentions I believed I could follow through with.

"My friend Eddie."

Eddie? "Who is…?"

"Oh, you know him."

I blinked. "Edward? Alice's brother?! That Edward?"

"Yep."

"Well, what was that all about?" I stammered. Emmett cracked his knuckles and grinning, enjoying himself.

"Turns out they want to thank you for your kind deeds, brother."

"They?"

"S'right. Miss Alice will be dining with you, me, and Eddie tonight." He smacked his hand with his fist and grinned, and I joined in--actually, I bombarded him with a hug and held on so long that he shoved me off and muttered for me to get ready and stop acting mental.

~*~

"How's this one look?"

"Alice, I'm hardly the one to ask! Where's Rosalie? Isn't she just across the hall? Go fetch her to get a decent opinion." Edward responded, flustered, as he whipped around his tie until it was perfectly done.

"Why in the world would I invite her in here with you looking like that?" I cried, gesturing to him as he stood positioned in front of our living room full length mirror. I was crying at him from the bathroom--my own reflection looking as annoyed as me.

"I suppose you have a point." he joked. I peeked my head out to watch Edward run his hands through his brilliant colored hair. He looked really dashing--I was practically counting on at least ten girls to be batting their lashes at him at the restaurant.

I was wearing a daring black dress now--and I didn't think it looked quite right. I ripped it off and snatched the next dress--and immediately liked it before putting it on, because it covered much more skin. It was a warm buttery yellow, and cap sleeved. I was tired of wearing revealing show get-ups. I pulled it on, and watched as the soft sequins sparkled subtly as I moved my hips. I grinned at my reflection and danced out to assist Edward if needed.

He straightened his tie, and his eyes lit up when he saw me. "Perfect!"

"Thank you. You look perfect, too!" I beamed at his laughter.

"You got everything?"

"Yes! Let's go." I led him out of our apartment.

~*~

I bounced in my seat anxiously, twisting my head in all directions. "Where are they, Edward?" I asked again.

He looked tired of my asking. His elbow was wedged on the table, his hand tangled in his hair as he spun his pocket watch on the table like a coin. I frowned and snatched it in mid spin. We'd only been there for five minutes? I groaned and tossed it back into his cupped white palms.

"Party of four?" a meek man's voice asked. I snapped up to see a waiter with a pencil moustache gesturing to two gentlemen trailing behind. I broke into a grin, wondering if I could possibly resist running for them right now…

"Eddie! Alice!" Emmett practically blocked my view of Jasper. Emmett did look handsome, don't get me wrong, but I wanted nothing but to see Jasper! All I could see was Emmett's huge charcoal jacket and soft blue undershirt. He took a seat and shook hands with Edward, who attempted to remain seated as his whole body was shaken by the pumps.

"Hello, Emmett. Jasper." Edward said smoothly. Jasper smiled, for he came into view as he took his own chair. I gazed upon his radiance.

His hair was blown back from the wind outside, the tendrils unruly. I loved that about it. His face was clean, smooth and seemingly carved of marble. He had the most beautiful face. His glittering ice green eyes flashed as he noticed me as well.

He clenched his jaw…the same thing I often did to suppress a huge grin. "Evening, Edward. Miss Alice." His voice was so mellow and smooth. I blinked and replied evenly, "Nice to see you gentlemen again…under more civil circumstances." Edward nodded.

The waiter that escorted them there returned, hardly giving time to decide what to eat. Jasper asked for a shrimp dish--and I hadn't found anything good so I asked for the same. His intriguing eyes flickered back to me, flashing in the light. I found myself speechless from them.

Edward and Emmett spoke like they were old pals. Emmett certainly looked like a clever and witty fellow. I smiled at his boisterousness.

As they were immersed in conversation, I glanced to Jasper, as he was sipping from his ice glass. He caught my eye. "Glad to see you recovered so well, Miss Alice."

I tried to brush off my violent shivers. "Please, it's just Alice. And thank you." He smiled, threatening to melt my heart. "Oh! And I brought your hat--it's out in Edward's truck."

He smiled a smidge wider, revealing sparkling teeth. "Thank you…Alice." I grinned idiotically.

"No, no. It's hardly a thing for everything you've done for me." As soon as I implied the night of my incident, I had to apologize for it. "I'm so sorry about the other night--"

"You have no reason to--"

"But I do! I puked on your friend's feet and brought you to my room and my dress and the juice…" I silenced myself, feeling a pink blush burn through my make up. Jasper was giving me a knowing look.

"It was the least I could do. Alice…it may sound odd, but it was a pleasure."

I bit my lip, and Jasper's eyes widened at his own words. He coughed into his fist, and we shifted our eyes from each other. Finally, I blurted, "Thank you. For staying when I asked you to."

He answered with a soft grin. His eyes were dancing in the light.

Our food came, and Edward and Emmett entered our conversation more.

"'Tis a shame we still haven't gotten to see you play yet, Eddie." Emmett said. Edward bowed his head gracefully over his steaming food. "Someday, my friend--perhaps this weekend?" Emmett nodded.

"Hey, did you know Jasper just got home from the army?" Emmett said proudly. Jasper ducked his head and rolled his eyes, letting them settle on me. I smiled. "Yeah--he's a hero." Emmett announced as Edward's eyes brightened.

"My! Was it an adventure? Did you come in close combat? Were there any frightening experiences?" I turned from my speaking brother to Jasper, but bit my lip hard when I did.

His face had gone pale, and Emmett was looking around the table cautiously. "Uhh…f-frightening experiences…?" Jasper stammered.

"Jasper? What is it? Are you alright? Would you prefer we not talk about it?" I stepped in quickly. He nodded briskly and took a swallow of ice chips. He dug a fork into his dish, but didn't eat much. I thought it was delicious…but something was obviously bothering him. I frowned.

Emmett quickly erased his mistake and changed the subject. "So, Alice. You look ravishing tonight." I felt a smile creep upon my features.

"You look quite dashing yourself." He grinned and Edward chuckled, forking at his steamy food. Jasper didn't talk as much as his brother, and I only wanted to hear his voice.

As our plates began to thin out, my heart began to race at the thought of leaving Jasper. I was so unsatisfied…I wanted to be held by him like when I had fallen ill--

No, no. That was a silly and crude wish. We hardly knew each other; but as I scolded myself, the dim images of us in each other's arms brought tingles over my flesh. I shivered and cast my eyes from the table.

Emmett dabbed a napkin to his lips and pushed from the table. The screech of the chair legs were like nails on a chalkboard. My head snapped up, eyes pooling. "We should probably get going…" Emmett glanced at his watch. It had to be about eight thirty…the time was eaten up mostly by Emmett's voice…not Jasper's. My heart pounded as I watched Jasper look up with cloudy eyes, his face expressionless. He began to nudge from his seat--

"Wait!" I cried, making his eyes widen with alert. I bit my lip, my heart twittering. "I still need to give you your hat back. Won't you accompany me out to Edward's truck?" I shakily stood up, while the men watched me.

"Alright." Jasper whispered. Edward's eyebrow raised.

"Hey, Eddie--let me chip in a couple bucks, huh?" Emmett must have gotten my hint, and began to argue politely over the bill. Edward wouldn't back down when it came to buying dinner for his sister's heroes.

I turned to Jasper, my eyes cast in the dim lights. He looked at me formally and began to lead me outside. He held open the door, and we stepped into the chilly night.

We walked silently down the sidewalk to Edward's truck, and I reached in lithely for the hat. I produced it for him, held it out in my white hands. He slowly took it from me and pressed it to his chest.

"Thank you, Alice." His eyes were so intense--much more so than at the dinner table. I stared at them, lost in their icy green fascination. Even when he shifted them slightly, I didn't avert my gaze. Was it rude? By the way he pulled at his collar, I didn't think so.

"Jasper?" I whispered. He looked at me, waiting. He bit his lip as I stepped closer. "I…I had a dream about you." I blurted. Good. Now he knew. I couldn't take it back, and I couldn't hold it in. Not any longer. I only hoped he felt the same way--and by the way he held my gaze that first moment we spotted each other and the way he watched over me in illness assured me.

Now I was maddeningly close, his eyes half closed as he watched me. "A dream? Of me?"

I nodded, and let my hands fall on his jacket, on the edges, pulling him. He came, his shoes scuffing the sidewalk. I could smell his clean scent--stronger than within the hat of his. I closed my eyes and silently inhaled, tilting my head upwards to gaze into his--and the exhale came out as, "I dreamt of you before I even met you."

He was silent, and as I opened my eyes, his were trained on me. My vision flicked to his lips, looking soft and gentle…desirable. Maddeningly so. He exhaled sharply as I craned my face towards his, slowly, testing to see if he would pull away. He didn't.

Instead, I felt his hand on the small of my back, and his touch sent tingling electricity through me. I sharply gasped as the warmth flowed within me, and my heart quickened pace.

My hand snaked from his jacket to behind his head, my fingers curling into his blonde locks, illuminated to a soft silver in the streetlamps. Our noses were nearly touching, and his hand was pressing harder, his eyes burning into mine. I could hardly stand it--my eyes closed and I felt his hand, his hair, his strong and lean body as my palm fanned over his jacketed back. His free hand brushed over my cheek, barely a touch--like a feather in the breeze.

I watched his cool green eyes, sparkling with white diamonds in the misty street lights. His pupils were black and shot with soft light, burning with the same feelings I had. I breathed, "Kiss me."

His hand found the back of my skull, cradling it with insane gentleness, as if I would break. The feeling of being something so delicate was wonderful. I watched him lower his eyelids, wet his sweet lips. I felt my heart beating, gushing needful blood. Jasper swallowed quietly, and I watched his Adam's apple bob charmingly. I hitched a breath and parted my lips…

"Hey, where did you park, Eddie?" A voice smashed my hope.

He broke away, his eyes still closed, his breath shaky. I was also breathless, and I let him go, much as it brought on unwelcome chill. He stepped away, his fingers grazing my hips in a way that made me shiver one last time.

I straightened up and looked at him, watched his hands tremble and his lips press together. He raised his eyes, boring into mine, seeing into me. I wondered if he could see all my secrets and thoughts in that one gaze.

He actually took a step forth once more, but froze when the restaurant door tinkled open, and Emmett's voice filled the night air. I turned away from Jasper, and realized with a white slash of horror that the hat was on the ground. I stooped to grab it, brushing it off hastily.

As Emmett and Edward rounded the corner, I shoved it at Jasper. "You dropped this!" I said with animation, as he stared back with huge eyes. I willed myself not to run to him again. He took the hat and nodded.

"Hey! Ready to go, Jasper?" Emmett grinned, as Edward walked to his truck and opened it. Jasper nodded stiffly…hesitantly. He stepped towards his brother, and I was alone in the sidewalk, beside Edward's truck.

"Hop in, Alice!" Edward flashed me a smile as he slid behind the wheel. He turned in the seat and called, "G'Bye, gents! Hope to see you this weekend!"

Emmett's reply: "You should stop by our cottage sometime! Tonight was great! Thanks a ton!" The huge figure turned and headed for his vehicle, but Jasper turned over his shoulder, his face thoughtful. I opened the door, watching intently. Jasper smiled softly…meaningfully, and followed Emmett into their car.

"Did you have a nice time?" Edward asked, starting the car. I realized I could see my breath fogging the air around me. I nodded. "Great." Edward grinned and began to head down the road.

I stared out the window, wishing for Jasper's flavor on my tongue. I hoped we could see each other again soon…I was shaking right now just from not being in his arms.


	7. Intentions

**_Another chappie yayy. please review, or this story will go kaput, forrealz._**

I walked into Emmett's little home, rather shakily. Emmett was going about inside his own little world, unbuttoning his jacket and tossing it aside. He patted his stomach and yawned. "That was a great dinner, huh, Jazz?"

I looked at him, dazed. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked. I blinked, and then it all came spilling out.

"I think I'm in love with Alice."

Emmett's eyes widened. "What?"

"I love her! I know we just met, but ever since I saw her--I can't stop thinking about her! The way she sings, smiles, talks, walks, acts--she's perfect! I don't think I can even wait until Friday to see her again." I looked up at Emmett's awed expression. "Oh--and in the streets? She asked me to kiss her!"

"Woah! Did you? Maybe she's a schizophrenic woman!"

I huffed a sigh. "She's perfectly…perfect! She just…well, I think she feels the same way. You can tell she doesn't flaunt herself around, leading random men on like Ros--" I bit my tongue and continued, ignoring Emmett's eyebrows rising. "But no, I didn't kiss her--and I've never…felt the same way about wanting a kiss before in my entire life."

"Well, Jazz, you have to admit you haven't gone along with a whole great amount of women." Emmett scratched his head. I pressed my lips together. "But why no kissin'?"

I growled to myself. "You and Edward turned the corner and--we couldn't do it with you guys watching."

Emmett chuckled; turned stern. "Sorry for killing your moment." I rolled my eyes.

"I know this is different, Em. I need to see her again. It's driving me mad."

"Then call her!" Emmett demanded, but I looked away.

"Definitely not tonight--too soon."

"You are so overanalyzing." Emmett growled and stalked off into his bedroom. I frowned and began to lay out my bed on the couch--I supposed I could go back to my own cottage now…but it was so far away. Away from Emmett, away from Alice.

I shed my jacket--Emmett's jacket…and slid under the threaded blanket. I stared through the sheer curtains for a long while, feeling the cold patch of moonlight target me. My hands looked blue in the pale light, I turned them around on my chest, studying them.

These were the hands that had held Alice. I had brushed her cheek, held her close. I imagined the feeling of her nimble fingers on my scalp, threading through my hair. I sighed and tucked away my hands, wondering if I would get a wink of sleep tonight.

~*~

"Alice?"

I shrieked and let the phone fall from my hands. I tried to grab it, but it simply bounded from palm to palm and clattered to the floor. I winced when it hit, but shrank back when Edward's huge green eyes were staring at me.

"What in the world? Alice, what is wrong?" He took a couple steps towards me, and I finally let my shoulders slump, and I decided to tell him what my intentions were.

"I…I was going to call…Jasper." A fierce blush tainted my face. I slapped my palms to my cheeks and groaned, sinking into a chair. "I…didn't I tell you about my dream?"

"Dream? I think you did--" Edward lithely sat on the bed near me.

"Yeah…I had a dream about Jasper…before I even met him!" I cried out. I sighed and willed myself to continue: " I think…I know it must sound totally ludicrous, but--I think I might love him."

Edward watched me. "Love him?"

I groaned. "Yes! Yes, okay? I love a man I have only known for a couple days--but it seems like we've known each other for so--!"

A sharp raping at the door startled me to a quiet.

Edward crossed the room, stone faced, to answer it.

There stood Bella, her face already pink, her hands slightly shaking. She managed a nervous smile, and offered Edward a piece of paper. "Here's next weekend's song choices from Joe. He…sent me to give them to you." I watched from afar, but I could still see how her eyes brightened when she met my brother's.

I couldn't hear what they began to talk about next, so I got up and entered the kitchen, waiting, but not wanting to eavesdrop or intrude. I heard Edward laugh…the gentleman-laugh he reserved for woman he liked…had to be, because I had never heard it nor ever seen him try to woo a girl. He was beyond picky. Seemed Bella was just his type.

I closed my eyes and smiled, but the attraction factor just made me think of Jasper more. I bit my lip and paced the kitchen until the door closed. I waited.

When Edward came into view, his face was soft and lingered with a smile.

"You like her." I said quietly. Edward looked at me, like he knew I had gone there. Did he?

"She's…different than most girls I've talked to." I smiled softly. "So…you were going to call Jasper?"

I sighed. "Yeah, but--won't I sound insane? I want to see him, but I can't ask him out, especially not tonight. We have rehearsal tonight, remember?" Edward's brow furrowed.

"I have a slight feeling you'd like to just skip through the date and--"

"Edward! Stop, you pig!" I cried, but I couldn't help but smile.

"So?" I asked hopefully, wishing Edward would suddenly turn into a love guru or something.

He was in mid shrug when the phone rang.

~*~

"Hello?"

Oh, God, her voice was so beautiful. It was perfectly sweet and kind and graceful. I swallowed, wondering if I could follow through. At least Emmett had left me alone to do this.

"Alice?" I whispered into the phone.

"Jasper? Is that you?" her voice was breathy and soft. I smiled.

"How are you today?"

"Fair enough." Our conversation was oddly quiet…private--sensual, maybe.

"Alice, what are you doing tonight?" I hissed into the phone, perhaps more fiercely than I intended. Her breathing hitched on the other side.

"I…have rehearsal tonight, Jasper."

I bit my lip, closed my eyes, "Oh. I see."

"Jasper?" she sounded hesitant, afraid she'd offended me.

"Yes, Alice?" I asked quickly. A pause.

"I still want to see you."

"Tonight? But you said--"

"Come afterwards."

I tried to make sense of where this was leading.

"When would that be?"

A longer pause. I actually wondered if she'd hung up, until--

"About ten."

"That's late." I breathed.

"I know."

"Alice…"

"Please, Jasper? Please? Come for me."

"Alright, Alice. Of course." I nodded to myself, my heart quickening.

"Thank you. And Jasper?"

"Yes?"

"I can hardly wait." her voice cracked a tiny bit, and I sucked in a breath at her need.

"I feel the same." I heard myself admit. It was true, though.

"See you then, I suppose." she whispered.

"Alright." Pause. "Alice?" I broke the silence.

"Yes?"

"When I come…will you tell me about the dream you had?"

Silence. Then: "I'll show you instead."

The line went dead.

It was nine fifty five.

I was riding up the elevator, the clunky humming the only noise I heard. I had gone to the rehearsal stage, but Alice had gone already. Rosalie was actually the only one left, and she told me that Alice had already gone upstairs. I tonelessly thanked her and darted for her room.

I stood before it now, not knowing what to expect. Was Alice really how I thought she was? She was inviting me over at a very late hour…what would she try with me? I bit my lip and wondered if I would stop her if she went to far or simply go along with it. I shook my head and knocked.

She opened the door in a frothy white nightgown. I heard nothing--Edward had gone. Another addition to my assumption.

"Jasper." My name sounded so wonderful from her mouth. She smiled wide, such a beautiful smile. I took a step forth, but chided myself and managed, "Good evening, Alice."

"Please come in." She opened the door wide, into the unlit bedroom that you had to immediately walk into. It was a rather small living space. She shut the door as I hovered towards the window, which was huge and grand, the sheer curtains flapping in the breeze. There was a lovely view of the little town from here--and the moon was the only thing joining us from outside.

I turned slightly, and Alice was there, watching me with huge blue eyes. She was watching me with unblinking fascination. "I'm glad you came." she murmured, as soft as a butterfly's beating wing. I ducked my head minutely, silently.

I scuffled through the foyer until Alice offered me a chair. I watched the thin little black chair, sitting alone on the carpet as the moonlight streaked it. I bit my lip and turned back to Alice, who was watching me with great steadiness. A blush spread over her cheeks when I caught her eyes lingering on my torso. Even through my clothes, I supposed you could see the arches and bends of my arms and body. She blinked and swerved away, busying herself like she hadn't know I was coming. It was already a rather spotless area.

"Alice." I said boldly, realizing my lowered voice, as if we were to be caught. Caught doing what? I screeched at myself. I should have no intention--

But she invited me here. She wanted me here--at a late hour. Was it a taboo if Alice was seen with a man? Surely it wouldn't be secret too long what with her high status in town. "I have to admit…" Did I have to admit? No, no. "…That you are almost…always on my mind."

There. It's said. It hung in the air, and I waited for Alice to take it in her hands and do something, anything with it.

Her huge blue eyes bore into mine, the moonlight spackling their gorgeous hue, their pooling innocence. I couldn't help but let my own eyes flicker upon her.

Her long crystal-milk neck and delicate flower petal shoulders were bathed in the softest, surreal light. Her chin jutted upwards as she watched me with those orb eyes, both haunting and beckoning. Her nightgown looked like it had been designed to rest over shoulders, but Alice had let them fall, having her flawless skin showcased. I bit my lip and turned my eyes as I had greedily drank the unbelievable texture that was her skin. A pale hand fluttered to her collar, as if to remind me where my mind and eyes were roaming. My own blush burned.

"You could probably see where my own intentions were flying the other night." Alice whispered, fingering her low gown collar. A tiny wrinkle appeared between her downcast eyes. I could almost see the bright blue reflecting off her pale cheekbones. I only nodded to her statement. I stepped closer to her.

"Alice, you know you are the most beautiful woman…" I broke off, feeling like a total dolt. But by the way Alice's eyes widened and lit, I wanted to give her every compliment worthy of her. She dropped her hand, pressed her delicious thin lips together.

"And, well, I haven't any idea what we are doing here like this, or how you feel exactly, but I know that you are the most quirky, funny, smart, witty and gorgeous person I have ever laid eyes on." My chest heaved through my short breaths, as if some scissors had snipped my strings of inhales short.

She took some steps towards me, her eyes wide and smiling. Her cheeks pulled with rose as she smiled that heavenly smile. Our bodies were nearly touching, and she tilted her head to meet my eyes.

"And you are the most caring, sensitive, handsome…sexy man I have ever laid eyes on."

I had to admit, I was taken aback by that last descriptor. By the way Alice blushed a fine pink, so was she. Her breath tickled my neck as she leaned in more and more.

I craned my neck low, catching her chin gently, moving my hand until my thumb rested on her lips. She gasped softly and closed her eyes, tensing her shoulders and grabbing my arm, holding my hand to her face. She parted her lips, and gently grazed her teeth against my rough thumb pad. I hissed in a breath at the intimacy in the little nibble. Her breath was warm against my finger, her teeth fine and alluring.

In a sudden movement, she flung under my arm, burying her face into my chest, clutching my body to hers. I felt her warm breath on my chest, and I hugged her back just as fiercely.

"Jasper, I feel like I have known you for my whole life." She had angled her head to say this, her voice quaking. She was literally trembling. I hugged her harder.

"Alice…"

"Jasper, I think I'm in love with you. I know I am, actually."

We grew still, and she was tense in my arms as I didn't respond. Finally, I whispered, "I knew it the moment I saw you."

She let out a breath like she'd been holding it in her little lungs, and flung herself at me. Our hug grew fiercer.

Her fingers tangled into my hair, her knotted knuckles firmly bringing my face over her shoulder. I let myself fall to her, let my hands cradle her. She was reaching from her toes, clawing at my shoulders to stay with me. I cannot say why I decided to act out my next move: I grabbed at her legs and hoisted her up. Her tiny chin tucked over my shoulder.

She didn't have to struggle to hold me any longer as I gripped her thighs, her legs wrapped securely around my waist. Was this insane? I didn't care…because I did love her. I loved Alice.

Her warm hands slid from my hair to my face, caressing my jaw and neck with firm, slow confidence. I missed a beat with my breathing and sharply gasped as her hand glued to my collarbone, stroking it. My heartbeat rung in my ears--I could practically hear my blood rushing through my body, my pupils dilating.

Oh, Lord, how I wanted to kiss her…feel her mouth on mine, small and petite and lovely.

Suddenly, her tiny hand was quickly going at my shirt tail--untucking it like her life depended on it. Cold horror lashed at my heart.

I released one of her thighs--but she was strong enough to keep herself on me. I tore my hand at hers, gripping her tiny fingers and ripping it from my skin. She broke from our embrace--which I would have had to do if she hadn't--and leaned over my shoulder, looking at how I had fiercely guided her hand.

I stood, silent, still. I let her hand fall limp…and I wondered if she had felt the scar.


	8. Need

"Jasper?"

I could only hear my shocked breathing. She was staring at me, her cheek on my shoulder, our eyes level. A hand stroked my cheek, so warm and understanding. "What is it?" her voice was so quiet and pleading. Her hand went to my back again, but not beneath my shirt. I jolted when she touched my scar through the fabric--I'm sure she could feel it through the thin material.

Alice let herself down, holding one shoulder. I could hardly stand how she looked at me with those huge eyes. I closed my own vision--welcoming darkness, until she pushed me.

I fell to her bed, on my back, my jacket splayed open. She hovered above me, her eyes glowing in the moonlight. She was so beautiful that I didn't even protest when she shed my jacket. She had me hypnotized, it seemed, as she carefully pulled my shirt out from my khakis, letting it lay carelessly across my stomach. If only I had the courage to kiss her.

"Jasper?"

I answered her with wide eyes, for I was at her mercy. When she applied pressure to my arm, trying to turn me over, I froze. I became a plank on her bed--I didn't want her to see.

Her lips came maddeningly close to my ear, and they whispered, "I noticed that you froze up at dinner when we talked about the war. You have nothing to be ashamed of, Jasper. It just shows how strong you are." She kissed the hollow below my ear, and I closed my eyes, bit my lip.

"Alice--"

"Please. Jasper, please--I want you to trust me."

I lay limp, and she rolled me over very carefully. I closed my eyes and laid my face in the blankets, and they felt cool against my blushed skin. My heart was still pounding, more so as Alice's tiny fingers lifted my shirt, rolled it up my torso, and looked at me.

I gathered folds of blankets in my hands and bit my tongue until it nearly gushed with blood. I fought to control myself from darting up and tucking back my shirt. Alice didn't say a word…instead, her lips traced up my scar.

I knew it would never go away--the scar. The flaw of my flesh. I gasped into the bed sheets as her lips and nose grazed up the scar, trailing through my shoulder blades, rippling my sensitive muscles. My shirt was nearly hooded over me as she rested her head at the end of the scar, right behind my shoulder. Her hands tangled softly into my hair again, her pinky straying to rub circles in my cheekbone. I sighed and let my back be bathed in the moonlight. I closed my eyes and felt the coolness on my backside, felt her warmth mingled upon it. I felt her eyelashes whisper over my skin when she blinked, and I could feel her breathing softly.

No one else could have gotten me to show them. Emmett hadn't ever asked, but I knew I wouldn't show him, either. Alice was the only one. I trusted her--I loved her.

Her lips met my ear, stroking against the lobe. "Turn over, Jasper." Her breathing was husky, and I knew now that we could share the special gift between us now. A kiss that should have happened long ago…

A soft rapping came from the door.

We froze in our intimate position. I stiffly lifted from the sheets, and Alice rolled away swiftly. Her little feet pattered across the carpet and I heard her soft palm slap the doorknob. The fact that the kiss had been so close agonized me.

Adjusting myself and tuning my breathing, I listened.

"Bella?" Alice breathed from the foyer. I kept to the shadows.

"Alice? Sorry to come in so late, but…is your brother here?" I heard her meek voice. Damn that little Bella and her terrible timing. I re-tucked my shirt, knowing that Bella needed guidance, and that would lead to my dismissal.

"No, he is not. Could you excuse me, Bella? He'll be back by morning, and I really have to go--"

"Oh, its just that I lent him my main key to the building and I just would like to--"

My head snapped up as Bella came in, with her waitress outfit still on. There was a massive brown stain on the front--not just the apron, but the whole front. Her eyes looked tired and gloomy, but they sparked in surprise when she found me crouched on the chair in the corner.

Alice tripped behind her, her blue eyes frantic and embarrassed. Bella's blush was apparent in the dark. "Oh, I'm so sorry I barged in like this--I, I thought you were alone, Miss." Bella swirled around and began for the door, empty-handed. The door firmly closed, and I looked up at Alice.

She sighed and crouched down to my eye level. Her little hand stroked the nape of my neck, making my hair there stand up and my skin break out in gooseflesh. She placed a soft hand on my thigh and leaned in, placing her hand on my chest. I cradled her there, making sure she was comfortable, until she whispered, "You should probably go."

The words jabbed at my heart with fresh, frozen pain. Would she depart--so unsatisfied? I huffed a sigh and pulled away from her wonderful figure. She looked up, brushing away a hair from her brow. Her face was sweetly serious. I smirked, and she smiled softly.

"I'm glad you came, Jasper." Her hand touched my cheek softly.

"Me, too." I whispered, taking her hand and kissing her palm. I knew she didn't want me to spend the night--I wanted Alice, yes, but not so soon that we were nearly strangers. We hadn't even kissed yet--which seemed ridiculous considering what we'd already done. I wanted to spend a day with her, get to know her, and find even more reasons to love her. It still hurt to leave her that way, though. She looked so beautiful and irresistible; to be honest with myself, when I first saw that flimsy nightgown, I wanted to rip it off of her. The thought made my face burn.

I stood up and she walked me to the foyer with her arm laced into mine, her head against my shoulder. She opened the door, letting the soft humming yellow of the hallway in.

She pressed against me, her eyes glimmering. Her arms wrapped around me, and I pulled her closer, only a hug, because I already felt like I was going too fast. Although I wanted one little kiss--I wanted to go steady.

Alice wouldn't have any of that, so she clasped to my face with snowy palms and kissed me herself. I was shocked for a moment as our first kiss flooded into my mouth. Alice's tiny yet strong lips pried my mouth open, and we tasted each other. She was so sweet and warm and wonderful. My hands cradled her face as a tingly sensation buzzed down to my toes. Once we pulled away, our breathing was labored. The jagged gasps echoed in the darkness. "Maybe you should stay." Alice said unevenly. I laughed nervously, tousling my hair with a shaking hand.

"Alice, much as I want to…" I broke off, unable to tell a plausible reason. I blinked, finding warmth inside of me. "Alice, I can't…not yet."

She bit her lip, and the pleading that filled her eyes made me nearly buckle to my knees. "Please, Jasper?" I moaned silently, and she slithered closer, muttering "Please, Jasper? Please? I need you."

I didn't think I would be anywhere near strong enough to walk away. Look at her! She was so beautiful, a vision in angelic white, her hair contrasting to her milky pale skin.

I bit my lip, tried to turn away. Her palm pressed to my cheek, beckoning me back. "Jasper?"

"Alice, all my life I have been raised as a gentleman, and gentlemen don't do this!" I hissed. Her face was stern.

" How are you are calling yourself anything but a gentleman? Jasper." She pressed on. I sighed, but it was labored, jagged--giving me away. My husky breathing was unforgiving.

"I cannot take that away from you, Alice. Not tonight." We both knew what that was, and I knew Alice still had it. I could just tell that she was not one to fall for men very often, but when she did, she was passionate. I knew I was the only one thus far she'd fallen over.

"I can't imagine giving that to anyone else but you, Jasper. I want you to have all of me, every single fiber and being! Please, Jasper." Her voice was thin and quiet.

"I'm sorry." I choked out.

She nodded, stepped away. Her eyes were so filled with sadness that I reached out, caught her chin. "Alice, please understand that I want to--"

"Will you, though? Someday?" She pleaded.

I nodded sternly. "I swear." She smiled softly, her sadness still lacing her features.

She stood on her toes and kissed my jaw line and then my lips.

I left the room with a burning mouth and tingles all over my body.


	9. Joy

I woke up the next morning, felt the cool sheets on my body. I stirred and tilted my head towards the bright sunlight outside, smiling softly.

"G'morning, Alice." Edward's soft voice came from the door, as his shining face peeked in. I sat up, groggily smiling like a drunk. A love struck drunk.

Edward came in, pocketing his key, and I wondered aloud, "Is that the master key?"

Edward gave me an odd look. "Why would you ask?" I smiled.

"Bella came knocking last night looking for it. Did you steal it from the poor girl?" I unfolded the sheets and began to rummage through my drawers for something to wear. I had rehearsals at noon, and I had already slept in until eleven. Edward snickered behind me.

"I just had to get something out of the closet to clean my piano, you know, rags and oil to buff it up a little, and she handed me the master key and said to go crazy, pretty much. I came back out and wanted to give it back, but she had gone."

"Do you find that strange?" I asked, pulling out a simple black cotton dress with modest cap sleeves. Edward stood in the kitchen, shaking his head.

"I find it rather intriguing. She's the only girl I have ever meet that hasn't had their eyes set on me like a rabid wolf. It's…refreshing." He smiled that goofy cock-eyed grin.

"You like her."

"I cannot tell a lie." Edward laughed heartily and sat down at is typewriter, preparing the paper and bustling his long legs as to not hit the table. I walked down the hall with my dress and a towel to shower with a smile.

Both myself and my brother seemed to be lucky in love at the moment, and I hoped that our luck wouldn't falter.

The water was hot and wonderful on my skin. It splashed off my body, flecking into my face. I felt the beads of water on my lips, warm and comforting. I looked at the tiles of the same old shower I'd been in so many times. The familiar cracks and residues in the corners looked dingy. The water hissed, and steam began to cloud my vision already.

I leaned against the tiles, lathering up some soap to clean up. I couldn't help but let my mind wander to Jasper. I blushed despite myself at his face popping into my mind now. These days, I was a regular Bella! It was so embarrassing sometimes, but I have noted that Jasper's eyes twinkle and he gets this little dimple in his cheek when I blushed.

I wondered when we would…I stopped myself there. How inappropriate. I scrubbed my skin until it was raw as I chided myself. I could hardly help it, though! I had seen his back, and that was pretty much all, but it had been enough for now.

I imagined that scar, jagged and laced with white, throbbing with pale purple-red. It traced along the plains of his perfect build, over his rippling shoulders and smooth lower back. My heart yearned to comfort him and to be comforted in return, to hold him and be held. To feel those arms around me again--perhaps minus the bulky jacket that separated us. I wanted to trace my fingers over the wiry veins of his well defined arms, marvel at his fine pale skin and kiss the wondrous texture, feel his warmth.

The knob shrieked when I turned off the water. Water dripped from my nose, my fingertips, my hair. I stepped from the shower, toweled off, rubbed away the mirror's condensation.

I dressed and dried my hair all the while watching my own face, glad that Jasper found beauty there. I knew I wasn't ugly or anything; I didn't want to be one of those silly girls that insisted on being apish and fat all the time, because I wasn't. I rather liked myself, and I supposed that was a good thing. I just wasn't Rosalie, whom I had watched countless times moon at herself in the mirrors behind closed curtains.

All ready, I walked out the bathroom, gathered my purse, and called at Edward that I was off to rehearse.

"So that blonde kid met you last night, huh?" Rosalie asked, powdering her nose. She was the only one with her mirror lights on, like tonight was a performance. Stupid.

I did bit my tongue at her statement. "How'd you know?" I hissed.

She shrugged, smirking. "He came down here last night looking for you. I directed him upstairs."

Oh. I had thought he'd come straight to my room, not here! "Did you tell anyone?" I groaned. She couldn't have. She knew the consequences of being in a relationship--

"Umm, I let Annie and Mona in, but that's all." she sighed, bored.

My heart skipped a beat, sputtered, tried to catch pace. I felt my throat constrict. "Rose…" I choked, "You didn't."

"Oh, Alice. Please put some faith in people." Rose clamped the caps on her perfumes.

"I'll…try." I gasped. Rose looked at me, concern budding in her chocolate eyes.

"I'm sorry Alice." Her voice rang with the most sincerity I've ever heard. "I didn't mean to--I was talking about how I stayed behind late last night and I think Mona saw us talking or something. I didn't want to say the guy was there for me. I didn't think you'd like that at all."

"It's okay. I'll just hope that Joe doesn't hear it." I said quietly, pulling my things together, getting ready to leave. Rose's eyes glazed.

"I'll tell them to keep it close. Don't be ashamed, Alice. He's pretty dashing." Rose winked at me, but her face suggested something else was meant to be said.

"What?" I asked, coming near.

"Umm…oh, it's nothing." Rose shook her head, stared at her reflection. I touched her shoulder. It was times like these I felt really sisterly towards her.

"Rose."

"Okay, okay. The blonde guy's friend? The muscle head, as you fondly call him?" I rolled my eyes. Rose bit her lip. "Do you think you could…introduce me?"

"Me?" Why would I need to do that? Rose could flaunt around and catch any man she wanted! Wait…was she, dare I say; nervous? My jaw hung.

"Please, Alice?" she pleaded.

"Of course, Rose." I blurted. Why not? I thought that Emmett had a sparkle in his eye when it came to my co-star--judging my how much he'd holler every weeknight at her intro. "I'll introduce you to Emmett."

"Emmett? His name is Emmett?" Her eyes lit up, like she now had a name to cherish, to whisper to herself when times were hard. I smiled and collected my things.

The days were becoming chillier and chillier. I pulled my scarf tighter as I exited the building, listening to my shoes click against the pavement. It was sunny, the clouds wispy and transparent, but I could still see a thin ribbon of mist seeping from my lips.

I was off to the bank--get my monthly pay. It was rather convenient that I lived in the same place as I worked, but that rent wasn't free. Nor was the food, even though on some occasions the entertainers sought little portions--the OJ for Edward, for example.

I liked to be out and about. It was nice. The sun was shining, the air crisp. The people in their trucks and buggies meandered down the streets, the fumes rising. The dogs were barking, the people talking, the babes crying.

After nodding my thanks to the bank teller, I tucked away my money and headed down the street, loving the cobblestone symphony my feet were making. I saw a small café on the corner of the block, and smiled, knowing I could spare a few pennies for a coffee. With foam, perhaps--why not indulge?

So I sat outside with my steaming cup warm in my palms, burning pleasantly. My taste bud felt slick and numb from the hotness, but I didn't care. The wind was fresh and clear, wiping at my bangs. I smiled into my cup, thinking of the sunshine, the freedom, the coffee, Jasper.

Ahh, Jasper. How I wished he was sitting with me now, his elbows on the tiny table, his eyes trained on me like I would suddenly do something he couldn't bear to miss. His eyes would be so mesmerizing with their piercing green hue, like the frosted overcoat of a lake in the mountains. His hair would tumble over his brow, a stray gold tendril, begging to be pushed aside. I sighed as I wished my fingers could be there now, touching his fine pale brow, marveling at the texture.

"Alice!"

I turned, my body erect. I slightly slumped when I found it was only Mona and Annie. Apparently I hadn't made my escape quick enough. They were kind girls, but they only knew to gossip, and I-

Gossip?! Oh no! They were coming to confront me about--

"Mind if we sit, love?" Mona's gravely voice inquired. I shook my head minutely, and they slid into their high stools. I stared at the foamy residue polling at the bottom of my cup.

"So, Alice. We heard that you had a little night visitor yesterday." Annie's eyes flashed. I clenched my jaw.

"Suppose it's true. And?" I boldly turned away, sipping air through my empty cup. Annie's lips went tight.

"Well, who is the guy?" Mona asked, her teeth glinting sun. She at least sounded sincere, but no--I couldn't tell them.

"No one. My…brother." I blurted.

"Didn't look like Edward to me." Mona purred. I was disgusted for a moment before shrugging.

"He just got out of the army." I decided, which wasn't a lie.

"Not convinced, Honey." Annie said. I frowned.

"It's none of your business, anyway." I snapped, picking up my things, preparing to walk on back. Mona and Annie stood, their eyes blazing. Suddenly, Mona's eyes popped, and she snatched Annie's arm. Their mouth opened slightly.

"What--?" I exclaimed, but when I turned, there he was. Jasper.

He was striding towards us, his locks whipping in the breeze. His face was shining with joy, his smile radiant when I saw him. His glittering green orbs looked doe-eyed with excitement. He looked as perfect as ever.

"Alice." he whispered, out of breath. He bent his head, bowing like a gentleman. I heard Annie shuffling to whisper into Mona's ear. I wrinkled my nose in privacy.

"Jasper." I breathed, caught off guard by his gloriousness. "What are you doing here?" I hissed.

He blinked. "I was picking up some groceries and I saw you over here. It's not a very big town, of course." He shrugged, smiling gaily like a love struck puppy. In this light, he looked so bright and happy. Sexy, one would say--an adjective that was suiting, but embarrassed him, I knew.

I had to remember that Mona and Annie were right behind me, but when Jasper obliviously brushed a stray hair from my face, the jig was up. The girls' whispers were sharp.

"Okay, okay." I snapped, turning to them, and then leaning into Jasper. He felt so warm in the chill, so strong. His arms wrapped around me, his chin on my head. I sighed and listened when the girls ran off. I didn't care anymore who knew about us. Let everyone know!

Jasper pulled me closer, making the chilly afternoon feel smoldering hot. He kissed my nose, as if we'd been together forever. I smiled, and he whispered into my hair, "Can I buy you lunch?"

"I just drank some coffee--"

"That isn't lunch, M'dear." he chuckled, pulling away, tugging my hand. I rolled my eyes and followed him. I'd follow him anywhere. God, I was glad he showed up.

(--------)

She caught me staring at her. Again.

Her jellied biscuit was poised to her mouth as she arched an eyebrow at me. I nearly knocked over my water glass when I was prying away my eyes.

Alice giggled, covering her little heart-shaped mouth with a napkin. I sighed but felt completely…complete. I laughed along with her, and explained, "You are just too pretty to not stare at."

She rolled her eyes and waved me off. I smiled again, unable to ever frown around her.

"So, what's the show this weekend?" I asked. She sweetly smirked.

"That's confidential, sir."

"Come on." I urged.

"Fine. It's a really spicy, fun number." She smiled seductively.

My heart started up a little. I jaggedly laughed. "I'll be there."

Her face softened. My hand was on the table, still on the water glass I'd nearly knocked over. Her tiny cream hand slithered over the tablecloth of the café table we sat at. We didn't go inside, either, though it was chilly, it was wonderful.

Her palm cupped over mine, her thumb curling beneath my fingers. Her hand felt soft and warm. It was so smooth, petite, gentle. I wished that last night we could have--

No, no! What an insincere pig I was for thinking of her that way. I swallowed harshly.

Her fingers stroked my palm, curving beneath the fingers.

"You better be there." Alice whispered, her face serious. I felt my eyes dim with love for this woman.

I noticed that her knees were brushing against mine, and I wished that our knees were bare. Again, I briefly chided my perverseness. I gazed at our hands, intertwined. I felt the loveliness in her palm, and I wondered if we had something more than love.

It was all very sudden, I felt. I didn't want it that way--like we had just met and we were already making out like those sickening teenagers. I wanted a timeless love that we'd worked for--and much as it pained me to have said it--I was glad that I hadn't taken Alice to bed. What would we be working for then? We'd have each other--all of each other, and I wanted to savor these sensitive moments when we didn't quite know each other's next move.

I curled my fingers around hers and brought her hand to my lips. I kissed her hand fully, hoping her taste would linger on my lips. She smiled, her eyes serene and calm as I squeezed her hand lovingly. "I love you, Alice." The words sounded so right.

She smiled wider. "I love you too, Jasper." I jumped a little when her free hand slunk beneath the table and squeezed my knee. I hissed in a breath and let out a shaky laugh as Alice raised one eyebrow. I felt her warm fingers caress through my khakis.

We had a lovely lunch, but soon enough, Alice had to return to her nightly rehearsal. She had to go get ready, but I didn't want her to go. Not yet--there weren't enough hours in the days. "Alice, would it be alright if I came and watched you rehearse?" I asked, my hand perched on her elbow as we stood from our chairs.

Her eyes were wide, her jet black hair quivering in the sweet wind. She clutched her purse and swallowed…tore her eyes from mine. "I'm afraid that's out of the question." I frowned.

"That's alright--but what's wrong Alice? Why do you look so--"

"Entertainers aren't supposed to date." Alice whispered, her large eyes meeting my confused ones. "It was in the contract--and I didn't think I'd ever meet a guy as amazing as you in this little town, Jazz. We are supposed to keep all free time reserved for performances, and we are unallowed to leave the building at night, and it's forbidden for visitors to enter."

'But I came in--" I tried, but she shook her head.

"I know, I know--but that was all behind Joe's back, you see. He doesn't know about you. About me. And he can't--or else…" Her frantic voice trailed off.

"You'll lose your job." I offered sadly. She looked up, a line forming between her eyebrows.

"Worse. I've heard of a girl that previously sang there. She tried to have a boyfriend--but she got caught. Mona ended up taking her place, and the fired woman's love was found on a hospital bed shortly after the banishment." Alice's normally-vivacious eyes dimmed with sadness. I hadn't known what risk was involved with simply seeing Alice! "You could be in danger if you get seen, Jasper." Alice murmured as she straightened her bag strap and began to walk. I hurried after her, grabbing her tiny shoulder.

I stared into her eyes and hissed, "I'd take one million punches for you, Alice--but I don't want you nor Edward to lose your job." Her eyes softened, and a ghost of a smile tweaked her lips. Her small, cool hand raised and brushed against my cheek. She rose on her tip toes to kiss my jaw.

"I'll see you soon. Promise." she whispered into the hollow by my ear. I shivered at her intimate words. A sheet of coldness wrapped me up as I watched Alice walk away.

(-----------------)

I slipped into the bar, shedding my jacket. All seemed quiet--and bare. I approached the stage, gathering the dog eared script from the little cubby on the way up the stairs. As soon as I was beneath the familiar lights--which were turned off, I began to flip through my pages. I smiled as I imagined myself performing that spicy number for Jasper. I flipped the packet closed, wondering where everyone had gone.

"Alice?"

I turned swiftly, to find Annie and Mona in the darkness. I raised an eyebrow, approaching. "What are you doing?" I asked sharply. Annie's eyes widened, and the two stepped from the shadows.

"Alice, we think it's great that you like this guy and all, but…" Mona broke off, looking at her comrade for help. Annie fidgeted. "We want you and him to be safe, y'know?"

I bit my lip, slightly annoyed. "Jasper and I can take care of ourselves, thank you."

"Well, like he said--it's a small town. News travels fast, and if you want to stay together--in one piece, you better keep low." Annie warned. I bit my lip, furrowed my brow.

"I said we are just--"

"Girls, girls. Back off her, won't you?" I snapped my head back to find Rosalie. She was entering the stage, her belongings abandoned on a bar table below. She shrugged out of her jacket and tossed it off stage. I sighed silently--I was glad for her stepping in now.

Rose smoothed her pastel blouse, arched an eyebrow at the gossipy women. "Are we going to rehearse or not?" She whipped out her lyrics and flipped through them as Annie and Mona dashed off to retrieve their own.

"Hey, thanks." I whispered. She smiled softly.

"A favor for a favor, Alice. Remember to mention me around Emmett, 'kay?"

I smiled back. "Of course, Rose."

As soon as the girls stumbled on back, Rose snapped her fingers. "Five, six, seven, eight!"


	10. Encouragement

Finally. Friday.

Throughout my life of waiting for the weekend, I had never been so elated for the day. Rehearsals really tied Alice up during the week, but I tried with all my might to be near her.

I asked her to come have lunch at Emmett's cottage, and she agreed…then asked if Rosalie could come, too. I was shocked, but blubbered a yes over the phone. She sounded relieved, and it was truly a pleasure to break the news to puppy-love Emmett.

"Talkin' to your girl?" Emmett smiled, walking into the living room as I sat the phone back on its cradle. I smirked.

"Yep. Actually, I invited her over for lunch today, if you don't mind." My face must've hinted mischievousness. Emmett played cool.

"Naw, that's fine. Alice is a swell girl. She'd just so sweet and polite." Emmett sized me up, and finally, I offered calmly:

"She's bringing a friend, by the way." Emmett's eyes flickered.

"Friend?" He pulled up to his chair, twiddling his thumbs to hide his hope.

I acted playfully coy. "I think you might know her. She goes by the name Ros--"

Emmett was already up, hugging me fiercely before I could say the whole name. He was quaking with laughter, and a small lean to the right sent us both to the ground. I groaned as my huge brother rolled off of me, but smiled weakly at his shining face. "Have I told you lately how lucky I am to have a brother like you?" he jested.

I rolled away, propping myself on my elbows. I coughed feebly and hissed, "Maybe you should remind me." Emmett bellowed and gave me a noogie hard enough to rub my scalp raw.

Only hours later, we were all sitting at Emmett's kitchen table (which we had to spend a lot of time cleaning off). I sat between Emmett and Alice, whom was stealing glances at me with beckoning eyes. I wanted to tell her to stop egging me on--especially when her smooth hand found my knee again.

I straightened up suddenly, making the water in out glasses quiver. Emmett's eyebrow arched, and I chided myself for not handling Alice's touch more subtly. I was also trying not to let my eyes blare down at her with accusation. She was smiling softly and forking her salad. She didn't look at me, but simply joined in the light conversation, all the while having her palm rest upon my leg.

I went to fork at my own dish, but hurriedly withdrew when I realized how much my hand was shaking. I swallowed and shot Alice a warning look, but she simply blinked and let her fingers wander upwards. I felt my face burn scarlet, and heard my heart accelerate.

I bit my lip as her tender fingers caressed my thigh--and I knew I would be hissing jagged breaths very soon. My back went as straight as a rod, and I clenched my jaw to keep my pleasured sighs from escaping. Her fingers dug into my flesh, kneading at it slowly and torturously. Each prod sent a white hot streak of pleasure through my body.

I gently pushed away her hand. It felt limp and hurt, but when I glanced over at her, Alice went back to smiling politely at Emmett's jokes and spearing her lettuce. What a mystery women were. Yet, I was so intrigued by them. Painfully so.

Rose and Em got along like salt and pepper. Rosalie seemed like a fine lady, and although she commanded presence with her looks, I thought Alice was the most gorgeous one in the room. In the world, even. Emmett was currently drizzling more Italian dressing upon Rose's garden greens. She laughed and told him to stop, but he simply smiled and tossed in a few croutons. I relished their laughter--her high pitched semi-annoying giggles along with his bellowing shake-the-house laughs.

As the two flirted, I sneakily returned to her hand, as if to apologize for refusing her. I grasped her limp fingers as they dangled beneath the table. I watched her face brighten as we touched. Her face turned to me, her bright blue eyes glittering. I smiled back, and squeezed our intertwined hands.

The lunch had been a highlight to the week, especially before Rose and Alice departed.

Em and I were walking them out to their car when Alice glanced at me, with desperate blue eyes. "Jazz, I forgot my purse. Do you mind if I go…?"

I tried to suppress a grin. "Oh, sure. Here, I'll come along." I tried to ignore Emmett's sly 'go-get-em-tiger' look. Alice danced up the stoop and disappeared.

I entered the house, securely closing the door. Out of no where, Alice leapt at me, her fingers clawing at my hair, her lips yawning at mine. Our lips met, our mouths battling with feverishness. My hands rubbed against her back, curled around her. Her tiny palms explored my chest and back, rubbing and kneading meaningfully. I gasped, breaking away from the kiss, but she simply tugged at my hair until our lips touched yet again. Who was I to deny her?

My fingertips grazed over her body, moving along the slender line of her hip. She shuddered delicately, bringing a new fire into me. I chuckled hoarsely before she moved deeper into the kiss, her fingers kneading into my skin desperately. I held her so close that our bodies pressed against each other. I could feel her tiny body, her petite and maddening curves. She exhaled sweet air into my throat and pulled away, her shoulders rising and falling rapidly.

"Alice…" I breathed, not allowing her space. She let her eyes flutter close, let her body lean to mine, before a shrill honk came from the other side of the cracked front door. She jumped away, fussing over her hair and clothes before smiling nervously.

"I have to go."

"I know." Before she could reach for the door, I grabbed her purse which lay on the floor and handed it to her. Her face was softly awed, and I fluidly bowed and took her fingers. I let my lips settle upon the smooth plane of her hand. A sweet floral sweet radiated amongst the creamy color of it. My lips brushed and pressed against the wonderful surface before I straightened up and gave her the best smile I could manage, under the circumstance of her departure. "Good bye, Alice."

She smiled apologetically, and swung out the door. I watched her scurry down the steps and fling into Rose's car. Rosalie's face held the remains of glowing attraction, too, and as they drove off, her large brown eyes held Emmett's as long as allowed.

-

Emmett and I sat in his car, listening to the vehicle run and travel over the bumpy roads. For once I didn't feel ill from the less than smooth ride, but my stomach still twittered with butterflies.

"Are you sure that you'll be okay with those?" Emmett asked, pointing at the bouquet in my hands. It was brimming with white orchids, with fine tufts of baby's breath lining it. I wasn't sure if Alice like orchids, but they did look wonderful in her hair, against her porcelain complexion and ebony hair.

"Don't worry, Emmett." I had told him about Alice's warming in a mocking tone, but he had taken it more seriously. I supposed he needed to as much as myself--Rose and he must be considered an item by now. I was glad for that. He deserved whatever he wished for. "If by some slim chance that Joe guy asks me about it, I'll just say I'm meeting a date there."

Emmett's face scrunched with uncertainty. His lack of faith was sort of dampening my excitement. "But didn't he sort of see you with Alice that night she fainted, I mean, you did sort of have a love struck looking expression, my friend."

I frowned, my fingers knotting around the bouquet's stems. The cellophane crinkled loudly. "He has no proof. He shouldn't even act like he owns Alice, anyway. No one owns her--and I'm probably the only one that would be able to take care of her right if she was fully mine, anyway."

I spun at Emmett, who looked slightly nervous at my outburst. He'd always been the loud, outspoken one, and I was always the shy polite one. I only wanted to step out of my comfort zone for once, and fully tell Alice how wonderful she was when she stepped on stage. I didn't want to only offer her a shaky 'you were great tonight.' She deserved more that that.

We were silent until we parked at the bar, people already flocking the entrance. I merrily jumped out of the car and shuffled for door without glancing back at Emmett. He had a look of frustration when he caught up, using his huge size as an advantage.

"I doubt we'll get the same seat this time, Jasper." Emmett warned as we entered the dark bar. The cigar smoke, sweat and booze was heavy in the murky air. My eyes settled upon our usual seat, which was occupied by a couple of porky looking middle aged women, rouge and powder caked on their round cheeks, their moth eaten fans twitching in their little hands.

I groaned before Emmett took my shoulder. "Hey, let's just grab a drink and stand against that bare patch of wall." I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, what a luxury! A whole patch of wall just for us?" Alright, maybe I was a little bitter from my disconnection to Alice. I quickly apologized, snapping out of my somewhat arrogant mood. I stared down at my flowers as we shoved past drunks. It was rather early, and there were already men staggering and women being grabbed by strangers.

We hadn't even reached the grimy white washed wall when the announcer took the stage. He extended his arms at the applause, his dimple-making smile corny. I sighed and nearly tripped over someone.

"I'm sorry!" I gasped for maybe the twentieth time. I brightened when the response was a familiar, "Don't mind me, sir."

"Bella!"

"Oh, hello, Jasper!" Bella's chocolate eyes went from dreary and exhausted to sparkling at my familiarity. She had a silver plate with glasses of half-drunk beer, littered with bottle caps. I didn't want to ask her for anything to drink--she looked busy enough.

"Jasper, would you like something? Anything? Is Emmett here? Want a couple beers?" She asked perkily, and I knew she hadn't offered anyone else that optimism tonight. I grimaced.

"Yeah, actually, only if that's alright, I mean--" Bella held out a hand with a friendly smirk. "It's my job. Just thank me if you feel guilty with a tip." She laughed nervously at her own carefree remark. I laughed and nodded, trying to find Emmett after he'd gone on without me.

"Ladies gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, our own pianist, Edward!" The announcer was flourishing off stage, and the huge thick curtains were chasing after as they parted. I smiled and pressed my back to the somehow greasy wall beside me grinning brother.

"That's our Eddy!" Emmett exclaimed as Edward had a spotlight trained on him. He was in his trademark black suit, which made him look dapper and handsome. His coppery hair gleamed in the light, his fair complexion white against the ebony clothing.

He turned to the crowd, smiling a friendly (I supposed women would find it alluring) crooked smile and sitting straight-backed on his black bench. He whipped out his long white fingers, and the metallic glint of a microphone perched in front of his mouth caught my eye. He was going to sing? He hadn't mentioned that he enjoyed singing, exactly. By the shrieks of the audience, apparently, they didn't either.

Edward leaned to the shining mic. He cleared his throat and said smoothly, "I'd like to give a vocal performance to a member of the audience tonight, who's identity will be later revealed." I supposed that the responding applause was only polite on the women's part--they were all slightly flustered that the perfect Edward had a lady (not that he said that, but what man would serenade another of his own sex?) friend that was not them.

His face became serious, and he pitched a few soft, wavering notes before bellowing fully and rather perfectly, "My gift is my song."

He commanded all attention with the smooth vocals. The moving of the crowd slowed, and heads of all colors turned to the stage, where the wonderfully charming young man perched at his piano. Edward's face was thoughtful and he turned slightly to the crowd, his wide emerald eyes on the crowd.

"And in this world…You can tell everybody that this is your song. It may be quite simple, now that it's done." A smile broke across his peaceful face, his eyes still somewhat urgent. "Hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind, that I've put down in words how wonderfully life is…now that you're in the world."

"Wow, Edward is really good." Emmett nudged me, his eyes wide and entranced by our friend. I was also rather moved by his performance, his sincerity was so obvious, like it was only him and the girl he was singing to…whoever that may be. Could it possibly be--?

"Now the sun's been kind, as I wrote this song…It's people like you that…keep it turned on." Emmett and I watched with wide eyes, among the sea of awed viewers. No one spoke, the waiters were moving slowly and hesitantly squirming through the maze of people while watching.

"Anyway the thing is, what I really mean….yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen." His voice rose, breaking through the clouds of grime, the drunken slurs. The sound was fluent and compelling, his words long and dripping with love, but for who? The admiration was ebbing and flowing through the crowd, hanging over our heads in mystery.

The piano keys became sharper, deeper, fuller. From somewhere--I assumed backstage, were croons and sighs, melodious and twinkling. I knew it was the Orchids, but the sounds were so soft and in sync that I couldn't pick out her voice. The high voices were trickling with happiness; it seemed that Edward's elation was contagious.

Edward was grinning fully at the crowd, his eyes suddenly blazing with feverish accomplishment. Already heads were twirling in the direction he was gazing at--it had to be the lucky woman that caught his eye. When Emmett and I turned to the far corner he was looking at, we saw Bella.

She was scarlet even in the dim light, her hands under a silver tray with two beers unopened upon it. Undoubtedly ours, I thought numbly. My mouth parted in shock, and many other people turned to the plain, cute brunette girl in her raggedly waitress uniform. I thought with some bitterness that some people may be still looking, refusing to believe little Bella was the one to win this star's heart. But it was true.

I knew it from the way Edward's face shone under the lights, his shoulders moving as he struck the keys. Or the way Bella looked just as shocked as we were, yet, beneath that thin layer of emotion laid love and gratitude in her own show number.

"And you can tell everybody… this is your song. It may be quite simple, now that it's done…" Edward's face was so happy that my own face broke into a grin as I turned to Bella, how she was handing her tray to that freckled girl we had seen on our first visit. The other girl was gaping at Bella, who was glowing through her pretty pink blush.

The tray clattered silently in the stranger girl's hands, and Bella moved through the crowd with a pleased, embarrassed smile on her plump lips. The crowd parted, some even clapping softly. I noticed Emmett's large mitt hands were thundering against each other, and soon enough, so were mine. I raised my beating palms, smiling 'til it hurt.

"Hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind, that I've put down in words…." Edward's voice was softer, calmer, his keys resorting to tinkling notes from his earlier booming, harsh ones. His eyes were peaceful, and I caught sight of Bella's brown locks under the yellowed lights. Her head bobbed through the crowd with ease, then halted at the foot of the stage. The spotlights illuminated off of her as she gazed at Edward, and he gazed back.

A few women cried out in lust (which I couldn't quite understand, since he was serenading his love for some other woman right in front of them) when Edward leapt from his piano, his long lean limbs poised. His white hand snatched the mic gracefully, bringing it to his upturned lips. "How wonderful life is, now that you're in the world…"

His pale hand turned out, the palm catching the light. He was offering her hand, and she numbly realized it as she stumbled up the few steps to take it.

I heard more of the audience clapping. Perhaps the jealous women were finally accepting it; supporting it. Edward continued, his first sentence full of the joy he wished to share: "Hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind, that I've put down in words…" The string of soothing lyrics faded, and Bella stepped closer, now fully on stage under the lights. Her hair shimmered, and the teeth caught the light, making them sparkle. Her cheeks were rosy and shapely in the brightness.

Edward's hand gripped on hers, and as his words quieted with passion, they came closer, their foreheads nearly touching, their eyes fluttering close as if this was a private moment instead of a performance. "…how wonderful life is…" Edward wedged the mike between them, dedicated to the song now. His voice was becoming stronger.

Edward threw back his head, slightly startling Bella, making us all start. I gasped a happy laugh as Edward belted out as loudly as he could, "Now that you're in the world!" He upraised the hand that had clung to Bella's, and reached down to cup her face. With the mic still in hand, he expertly kissed her on stage.

The crowd erupted in the loudest applause I'd ever known, and my heart swelled with such happiness in the moment that I clutched my chest, the flowers tickling my chin. Emmett hooted and hollered, clapped and screamed. I laughed softly, and the two didn't break away until after the curtains were drawn, leaving us with a heartwarming image of two lovers that had crossed lines…practically erasing them without a care in the world.

**i may not have gotten all the lyrics correct, but i was listening to the Moulin Rogue version, not Elton's. The song is on my playlist link on my profile--i will add it the moment it is posted!


	11. Agony

"That was so amazing." Mona peered back at us, her eyes huge and glittering. I had already stepped back, having seen the entire performance. I was so blissful that one little rule that our boss kept was wedged in the deepest corner of my mind, forgotten. All us Orchids were clapping, our mic-stands in the background after we'd helped Edward with a little backup vocals.

"Are you ladies ready?" Mr. Clark appeared, fidgeting with his cuff links. I sighed softly, not wanting to try to show that up. That was enough soul and talent in one performance to last this place a month! "Let's go, let's go!" the man urged, waving his arm.

All dressed and ready, we swung our stands in our hands and hurried to line up. I smiled to myself, making a note to maybe ask Edward to give me a hand in dedicating one to my own true love.

~*~

"Em, I'm gonna get closer to stage. I want to catch her before she goes to her room." Emmett's face twisted at my words.

"I don't know, man. That doesn't seem like a good--"

"Didn't you just see Edward? That was quite public, don't you think? And do you see anyone getting beat up or publicly fired?" I rolled my eyes when Emmett craned his neck as if one would suddenly break out now. I moaned playfully and swatted his huge arm. "I think you worry too much."

I was making my way through the crowd before he could respond. I was jostled and bumped as I carried on, but I finally reached the edge of the stage, right beside a couple of tables. The announcer was already on stage, looking as corny as ever.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, let's see if these ladies can pull their own after that performance! Here's the Orchids: Mona, Annie, Rosalie, and Alice!" Applause bludgeoned my ears, but even that couldn't make me pry my eyes from Alice. She looked as perfect as ever, her smile large with white teeth and bright red lipstick. A flower clung to her ebony hair, curled prettily. Her outfit was a deep maroon color with strings upon strings of beads and jewels and sequins. This certainly looked appropriate for a 'fun, spicy number.'

All the girls grasped their mic stands, and some exotic sounding music played from the band, whom I had forgotten about after Edward's one-man-show. Drums and reedy tinkling rang out as the girls began to dance. Of course, Alice was the ones with the steady, mind numbing hips. I smiled and stepped closer. She probably would be looking around the crowd for me, only to be surprised later.

"The beat of the rhythm of the night…Forget about the worries on your mind…" Mona, Rose and Annie chanted softly. Alice seized her mic and crooned, "Yeah, the rhythm…"

"When it feels like the world is on your shoulders, and all of the madness has got you going crazy…" She swayed her hips, her mouth curling with fierce beauty. My heart muttered. "It's time to get out, your body in the street, where all of the action, is right there at your feet, well!"

The other girls picked up their mics and proceeded to bump around their hips (not as impressively, might I add) with Alice. They all sang, "I know a place where we can dance the whole night away…"

Alice's glittering eyes widened, her friendly seductiveness peaking. "Just come with me and we'll shake your blues right away, you'll be feeling fine once the music starts!"

"Excuse me, sir."

The gruff voice plunged me back to realize that I was in a dirty bar that just so happened to have classy singers. I spun around, and there was Joe. My heart choked a little, my hand tightening convulsively as it to remind myself that I was carrying flowers and gazing longingly at a woman on stage. I opened my mouth to somehow explain, but he wouldn't let me. His beefy pink fingers gripped around my arm, jerking me forth. A few petals in the bouquet tore free, fluttering in surrender.

"The beat of the rhythm of the night…" The girls continued, oblivious.

"Can I have a word, sir?" Joe's bloodshot eyes did not suggest that this would be a pleasant conversation. His firey ginger hair blazed in the faint show lights. He didn't wait for an answer before ushering me towards a near door. He pressed me against it, crudely using me as a tool so he wouldn't have to touch the grimy push handle. I bit my lip, wondering if this really could become violent.

Just as the door began to swing closed, I heard Alice chirp vivaciously "We can leave it all behind…" I swallowed audibly when the door clanked shut from Joe's meaty pink hand.

It was silent now, the music cut off except for a muffled hum. Joe straightened himself, sizing me up. His eyes rested on the flowers, looking weak and battered now. A few petals strayed by my feet.

"Are you dating one of my singers, boy?" He growled. I veered back, clutching the flowers. I decided to play dumb; maybe it would work.

"Is there a problem if I am?" I asked innocently. He didn't appear to be buying it. His eyes narrowed into tiny slits of sharp blue ice shards.

"As a matter of fact, there is. A big one. My performers don't date. Cuts into rehearsal."

My response was both logical and somehow flustered. "I just saw a performer serenade a girl, so why can't I bring a woman flowers?" I jerkily gestured at the dying mass of snowy petals in my hand. Joe's face became a shade pinker.

"I know Bella, the girl. I know Edward, too. They both work here, so I could care less if they do whatever they do, just as long as they some to work on time. They have nearly the same schedules, and hardly seem like the type to let that crap get in the way."

"Are you saying that Alice is? She's punctual and very considerate." My fists curled into bunched up fists, masses of white knuckles. The cellophane cried under my grip.

"I'm saying that I don't know you, nor do I plan to. You seem like some stuck up pretty boy that want to get into Alice's pants by way of gifts and false affection!"

At that, I narrowed my eyes, pure anger blazing within me. "You don't know me, so you cannot assume what my intentions are!"

"What other intention could a man have with a girl like my Alice? She's a perfect starlet, and you're just some guy looking for a gal for the weekend!" Joe roared back, but as soon as he said 'My Alice,' my ears blotted the rest out in rage.

"She…is not...your property." My voice quavered, my free hand pointing at his big beefy face. His swollen eyes squinted, his brow furrowed, and then he swung.

_"Look out on the street now, the party's just beginning! The music's playing, a celebration's starting!"_

Blood gushed into my mouth, my lip searing with fresh pain. My tooth must've slashed through it when Joe punched at my face. I felt my head rock back, I could feel the throbbing where Joe's heavy metal rings had cut my skin. I gasped, and felt the flowers fall from my hands as I tried to catch myself on my palms, but I was simply rewarded with my elbows popping painfully from my weight bashing down on them.

_"Under the streetlights, a scene is being set…"_

My eyes shot open against the blaring white light above me, and my back screamed in pain from the less than graceful fall. I wondered if I could possibly get up and fight, but my head swam when I went so far as to prop myself up on my swelling elbows. As I groaned and cupped my head, Joe took no mercy with me. Me, who he saw as some blonde pervert that believed he could get his way with any woman he liked, which was exactly what I didn't want to be. My family had always raised me and Emmett to be gentlemen, so why did he think--

I saw a flash of Joe's heavy boot in the glinting white light before it struck.

_"…a night for romance, a night you won't forget!"_

I groaned sharply and cupped my ribs, which felt to be cracking, their jagged bone edges pricking my skin. I gasped for air, but it felt like I was sucking in purely sharp silver needles. I tried to get away once I saw Joe's vicious foot rearing back. I rolled away, but only managed once over before collapsing in utter agony. I gripped at my shirt, my side throbbing, and screamed. As loud as I--

_"…So come join the fun, this ain't no time to be staying home…"_

He rolled me over sharply, not bothering to make me comfortable, of course. My ribs screamed in pain. He crouched and gathered my shirt, blotted in blood, in his porky hand. I stared at the freckles, which seemed to be dancing over his skin. Not a good sign. My eyes were dim, my reaction quickness shot, when he took his fist to my face once more. I couldn't see through my slowly swelling eyelids, heavy with fatigued pain. My mouth was droopy and numb, slicked with blood. Needles prickled at my torso, and every breath as like a ton was dropped on my chest.

"Listen, you little brat! If I ever see you here again, I won't let you off so easy. And Alice--if you really cared about her, you'd stay away for her sake as well. I won't fire her for this little mishap, but I may have to remind her to choose her dates more carefully." His breath stank of liquor and heavy smoke and garlicy food. His teeth were all kinds of shades of yellow, green, and brown. I didn't even try to reply; I only let my head roll backwards weakly in response.

I gasped sharply in pain, wincing as he dragged me to me feet. I could hardly see, hardly walk. I leaned against the wall, my heart pounding dully, my breathing labored and excruciating. Joe stood there, sizing me up as I struggled not to pass out. I choked on air, my lungs and side searing with white hot pain, and out of my mouth came a blotted spray of scarlet. My shirt was dotted in the color. Emmett's shirt, I supposed.

I weakly gazed down at the orchids, which had caused all this. I was such a fool, blowing off Emmett. I shuddered, a fine ribbon of blood escaping my weak lips. Joe noticed my longing gaze at the bouquet, a few flowers strewn out, petals everywhere like snow. I blinked away the darkness of unconsciousness when I saw one orchid nestled in the massacred bundle; one petal was stained with a dark maroon. My blood.

I winced when Joe's huge boot stomped on the flowers, grounding the fragile white petals into the thread bare carpet. Green juices shot from the stems, and the white plush became yellowy pulp. With that, Joe straightened his jacket and dashed back in the bar.

My shoulders quaked, my fingers were numb against the chilly wall. It hurt to bring together my lips, but it sickened me to leave my mouth open and watch the blood drip from it. I glanced down the naked hall, and saw that at the end of it was black sky with twinkling city lights.

It took me perhaps ten minutes to make it down there, and it really only several feet. I'd left a few bloody smears on the walls, having to use them to prop against. Perhaps someone would see the evidence and realize what a monster Joe was. The flowers also remained.

I reached out for the door, pushing against it with only my weight. My feet tangled and I nearly fell onto the grimy pavement. Once outside, I inhaled the fresh air, thirsty for it, but was only rewarded with a fresh torrent of pain gushing from my side. I grunted, hissing in gentle air as I slid against the outdoor wall, until my bottom met the cool ground.

Gasping from the effort, I realized that I was in somewhat of an alley, a back way from the entrance. I wondered weakly if Emmett would think to look here. For now, I could rest--I didn't know how much longer there was to the bar's hours. Soon, I'd crawl to Emmett's truck at least.

I pressed my cheek to the cool brick wall, my body screaming in pain. My face felt fat and numb and torn to ribbons. I didn't dare explore the inners of my mouth with my lightly split tongue, for I feared I would realize that I was missing a few teeth or feel a gruesomely deep cut. I just didn't need something that colorful right now.

My eyelids were so heavy, and I knew that I wouldn't make it to Emmett's truck. I could only pray he'd go looking. I wasn't far from the corner, if he'd just step a little to the right from the entrance, he'd surely find me. Take me home. Get me to sleep. Get me medics.

As it did, faintly I heard a voice singing as if nothing was wrong. Surely it was only my imagination, since I was clear out here.

_"Come join the fun and we'll dance the whole night away, we'll have a good time the whole night long…!"_

Blackness enveloped me, and I did nothing to fight it off. I couldn't fight anymore.

___

sorta violent. sorry about that.

the song is where you find the rest you know--my profile! this song was called 'rhythm of teh night' from the moulin rogue! soundtrack again. so original, huh? bah.


	12. Regret

As we scuffled off stage in our killer high stilettos, the gnawing disappointment was getting to me. I hadn't seen Jasper--though I did meet Emmett's big merry eyes. But no Jasper. Where was he?

Rosalie was grinning ear to ear and shaking my bare shoulder. "Alice, Em came! Did you see?" I simply nodded politely and let her jet off to smile at her elated reflection. I sighed and slipped out of my shoes, feeling burning rejection begin to swirl in my heart. No, that was silly. Jasper had to be here, either that or he had a very good reason to be absent. He did say he'd be here.

I could hear the crowd's muffled cries and slurs dying out--it was late and they had seen the shows. They were happily drunk and ready to pass out in their houses.

I slipped behind the changing shade, slipping out of the mass of looping beads and glimmering sequins. It fell at me feet with a hollow rattle, and I reached for my plain cotton dress that I wore home. It was soft and familiar against my hot skin.

Pulling at my little cardigan, I walked past the girls as they snuggled on slippers and pulled on their knitted hoods. "Good night, ladies." I said curtly with a tight smile. Before I could reach the exit, Rose grabbed my sleeve.

"Alice, are you okay?" Her brown eyes caught the warm light.

I sighed and blinked. "Jasper didn't come see me." I whispered. Rose gave me a knowing look.

"I know he has a good reason, Alice." I shrugged and pulled from her, bitter jealousy boiling that her man had come to watch her.

I was planning on heading straight upstairs, but the nasty smell of the bar was really pungent in my sensitive nose. I gagged and turned to the little hallway which led outside. I surveyed the bar--there were barely any people left--only those who were no longer conscious.

I let my min wander to Edward and his happiness. Rose was in love, and so was he and Bella. All my closest friends were happy and I had love, too, and I was suddenly determined not to let this little thing bother me. I knew Jasper cared. Maybe he was in the bathroom and couldn't get up close, or maybe I just hadn't seen him.

I stepped down from the stage, and looked up to be startled by a massive body. 'Alice! You were magnificent!" Emmett. Of course.

I laughed and patted his huge shoulder until he finally released me. I was surprised to see I had to be set back on the floor, for he had scooped me up like a doll. He looked handsome and sharp in a brown and tan pinstripe shirt. "Hey, Em. Have you seen Jasper? Did he come tonight?"

My words were innocent enough, but his face washed out of color, and his sparkling eyes switched to dullness. His shoulders tensed, and he hissed, "Wasn't he with you?"

I blinked, my flesh rising with goose bumps. "No."

Emmett ruffled at his hair and swore under his breath. "God, Alice. He was standing by the stage, waiting for you to get done so he could talk to you." He motioned to a spot near the stage that was only three feet away. I swallowed.

"Oh, Lord." I whispered, my voice quavering. "Where do you…?" I shook my head, my body suddenly limp and numb. Emmett took my shoulder.

"I don't know where he is, but I'm the one with the car keys. He has to be nearby." I let Emmett's big hand lead my shoulder until we began to head for the grimy exit door to our left. "Here, you take a peek down there and I'll check out front. Maybe he's waiting there."

I nodded silently as Emmett bounded off, dodging messy tables and overturned chairs. I bit my lip and pulled my cardigan close, fearing the worst.

I pressed against the cool door, trying not to let myself assume the worst. Maybe he was outside waiting. Maybe--

The door swung open, and the light was harshly white. I squinted and looked around.

A maid was hunched over the wall with a sponge in her hand. She had faint wrinkles and salt and pepper hair in a loose bun. Tendrils clung to her leathery face, and her gray eyes widened.

Not as much as mine, I'm sure.

I sucked in a breath when I saw what she was doing. She was scrubbing the walls clean--of what, you ask? My eyes darted down the hall, and bile rose in my throat when I saw swatches of brown-maroon on the alabaster walls.

Blood.

I clamped a hand to my mouth and let out a muffled cry, my eyes darting all around me. Beside the woman was a tiny garbage can from her cart which sat in the shadows of the hall. I staggered back until my shoulder blade cut into the door jamb.

In the little blue garbage can was a mess of cellophane, muddy and crinkled, and broken stems, deep brown green with death. Petals clung weakly in the can by their sticky yellow moisture of being mashed up. I sharply inhaled when I spotted a faint blotch of pinkish-red stain on one pulpy flower.

The maid remained on her knees, staring up at me as I began to pant with fear. "Miss?" She asked in a heavy accent. I shook my head and darted down the hall, praying that my legs wouldn't give out just yet. I moaned in my throat, and even as I told myself it could be something else and I was just getting worked up…the chances of that was about one in a hundred. Meaning there was about a ninety-nine percent chance that I had just been looking at Jasper's blood.

I burst out the glass doors, expecting to see Jasper right there in a muddy puddle. He wasn't there. I was panting as I left the building, the doors swinging shut behind me. Now I could only hear the buzzing of the sleepy town--cars chugging and alley cats mewling. I pulled at my sleeves and listened to my little bootie shoes patter over the grimy gravel alley.

I was rather dark--I could only see down the end of the alley to the street, where cars were lazily scooting by. I tried to perk up my ears for anything unusual. Maybe Jasper had already gotten home. Maybe Emmett found him. Maybe he was in Emmett's truck right now. Maybe I should go check.

I picked up my pace, wishing suddenly to see Emmett and tell him what I had seen in the hallway. I shuddered in the chilly night, a thin curl of white air releasing from my lips. My eyes kept to the cracks in the alley walls, as if Jasper would spring out, as fine as can be, and scoop me into a relieved hug.

My bootie shoe suddenly prodded into something that felt like a tightly packed garbage sack. I flailed out my arms to steady myself, my nails awkwardly raking the brick wall. I gasped in surprise, brushing away my stray bangs, looking back to find the thing I had tripped over.

The faint glow of the road's streetlamps sculpted something I certainly didn't want to see.

A leg protruded from the darkness, the fine dress shoe scuffed and drenched in alley grime and the pant leg soaked with juices I didn't care to know about. Yet, somehow, I knew that shoe, I knew that pair of pants. "Jasper!" I cried, though it came out a strangled moan, wordless.

I knelt down, the moisture of the street creeping up my dress hem. My blind hands reached out, and sure enough, I found the familiar firmness of his chest, but the way it rose and fell was jagged and unnatural. I told myself not to panic or breakdown, for Jasper needed me more than ever.

I couldn't see his face, and wasn't sure if I wanted to. He wasn't responding, but I could feel his breathing. He was alive, at least. I hissed out a thin breath, my hands gingerly traveling upwards until I felt his face. I carefully cradled his head, his soft blonde curls twining around my fingers. "Oh, Jasper."

"Al..."

At the sound of his voice, I shushed him fiercely, cringing at his voice. It sounded like he'd been gargling glass. I knew he'd already seen my face awash with tears in the streetlamps, but i turned from him in sorrow.

I wished to stay with him, but that wouldn't help his condition. I cried out softly when I drew away and stood up, not baring to leave him be. With my feverish eyes still trained on his leg, I side-ran to the corner. Good thing Emmett was parked nearby.

"Emmett!" I screamed, making a few slurred looking men glance over. They waved me off and proceeded to shuffle to their cars. Across the lamp-lit street, I saw Emmett's large truck paired with his hulky frame. He turned to me, his eyes obviously expectant even from afar. I fought back a grimace unsuccessfully and croaked, "Come here!" I waved him forth, and he hesitantly jogged over, not liking my strained voice.

"What is it, Alice? Did you find--?" Emmett's eyes widened when I cut him off, simply pointing at the lone leg in the darkness, illuminated by polluted yellow light. Emmett's eyebrows knitted together, and he wordlessly hurried over, nearly falling from the slippery oil slicks under us.

I watched from a few feet back with a quivering lip and wide eyes as Emmett knelt in the garbage. I could feel my dress clinging to my own moistened skin in disgust. "Oh, Jazz." Emmett sighed, his hand reaching into darkness. I waited, my hands quaking like crazy.

We both grimaced when Emmett pulled Jasper out of the darkness. I slapped a hand to my face and sobbed sharply, turning away in despair.

Jasper's shirt had been lacking a few top buttons, the threads poking out. Blobs of maroon were sprinkled over his chest, and his head lolled around on his slumped shoulders. His once-wonderful blond curls were thick and dripping with sweat and blood. They clung to his sallow face gruesomely.

His lips were smeared with maroon blood, still tacky. His eye sockets were a sickly purple-green, his whole face slicked with sweat. His body was lifeless, but I had to remind myself that he'd been breathing--still was.

"Oh, God, Emmett! Look what's happened, I--" I covered my face and shuddered fitfully. Emmett said nothing, he simply looped his huge arms under his brother and stood, Jasper hanging in his grasp like a scarecrow. His limbs dangled, his bare elbows purplish and swollen with bruises. I tore my eyes away from him when Emmett spoke: "His breathing is irregular." His voice was maddeningly grave. A small pucker mark erupted between his eyebrows, as if he were about to cry, too.

"I know. He needs a doctor." I sniffed sharply, realizing that my hand was slicked with tears and snot when I pulled it away from my face. I hugged myself and watched as Emmett slowly began to walk down the alley. "May I come, too, Emmett?" I said pleadingly. "I must. I really must." I blinked, sending a few more tears down my cheeks.

Emmett didn't answer, but I followed him to his truck wordlessly, not needing an answer.

Emmett laid Jasper in the back seat, and I insisted on being there with him. Em laid his head on my lap, his face slowly twisting with fear and grief. I tore my eyes from his--deep green and pooling with sorrow for his brother. How he must blame me for this…I grimaced when he shut the door and hurried to the driver's seat. We drove.

The twinkling lights of the town sickened me--everyone out there was asleep in their beds while I was holding my love's unconscious head. I looked down as the street lamps passed, throwing light on Jasper. I brushed away his matted hair, biting my lip and watching tears fall on my dress. His lips were parted and swollen, and his left eye was also looking like it was growing. A purplish red ring surrounded his closed eye.

I bit my finger and shook my head, mostly to myself, mostly for what'd I'd done. Should I have broken up with jasper? Just so he wouldn't be harmed? I knew the consequences. I knew. I knew.

I must've been crying over Jasper longer than I'd thought--Emmett pulled up by the town doctor's office. Jasper's face was wet with my tears. I watched Emmett bustle out of his seat and come 'round to lift Jasper out.

We both hurried inside, Emmett carrying him as I held his limp hand.

----

apologies. i've been thru quite a lot in the past few months. and the depressing crapola is almost done. promise!


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